Thank you for sharing that with us. It's searing and unimaginable and you absolutely should not have to carry the weight of that memory alone.

There is mercy in that someone who loved her told them.

This. It's bleak to no comfort, but a kind and polite stranger would have been even worse, would have broken them even more badly (and they might not even have wailed or pleaded, but might have felt compelled to keep their shit together until after the call was over, even if it wrecked them even more -- but you are an emotional safe place for them; you're on the inside of their circle of absolute unguarded trust).

Allyson, much love to you. I'm sorry you had to go through that, but I'm glad it was you and not some stranger who broke the news to ita's family.

Oh Allyson. So sorry. No words are enough. But you didn't do anything wrong. You did something impossibly difficult the best you could.

And I needed a new post to say...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE NICEST!

Oh, Allyson. I am so sorry you have that weight on top if everything else.

God, Allyson. So hard.

I still vividly remember the anguish in my Mom's voice calling out to me after she got the call that her father had died.

Oh, Allyson. My heart is breaking for you. Trudy and others have already said what I would, and better.

Allyson, that is awful. I am so sorry you are going through this. I think this is probably why (even thought you feel inadequate to the task) her parents and sister are thanking you profusely.

I am so sorry you have that memory to carry, Allyson As glad as I am that someone who loved ita delivered the news, as someone who loves you, I also want to punch fate in the 'nads for making that person have to be you.

Oh, God, Allyson. So hard.

Please know that nobody could have handled it any better than you did, and take whatever time you need, and snuggle with your pets.