Sean, surgery is scary and anxiety about it is completely allowed. Definitely ask for lorazepam; it should take the edge off. When I had to have emergency exploratory surgery, they had to give me a giant dose to chill me out, and I'm quite used to having surgeries. For some reason, that one just pushed me right over the edge.

Oh, Betsy, it's really just so encouraging to hear good news about the migraines in your household.

Yay, katefate!

Thinking about not running the marathon may not sound like a big emotional deal, but it's hard to even contemplate when I've worked so hard for it and wanted it so badly.

Pix, it very much sounds like a big deal to me. You have worked so hard.

{{{Strix and family}}} I am so very sorry, love.

Thank god a crisis brings out the best in me.

Oh, same here. Be careful, though, the aftermath is a total bitch to recover from. Make sure to eat and drink plenty of water and try to sleep. /mom Also, more love.

If you think about it, it makes sense. ita was one of the people who brought us here and she still has that ability. There's something beautiful about her building community still.

I keep thinking this as well.

This "good" drugs and "bad" drugs and "good" users and "bad" users paradigm is completely unproductive. Drugs can have undesired effects. Tolerance and addiction are among them. Here's some crazy shit - treat your patients as individuals and address whatever problems they develop.

Truth. I've been seriously blessed when it comes to my team of doctors, and I've only had one experience of being stalled getting meds because the doctor thought I was drug seeking. But, that one experience changed me and the way I ask for the meds I need. When I was admitted to deliver Patrick I asked the nurse for Ativan and made a point to say I wasn't drug seeking, and she could check my charts or call my shrink. And she just looked at me like I was crazy and said, "Honey, you can have as much Ativan as you need." It was such an interesting comparison, though. I thought of that when I read your "good" "bad" post, Trudy.

So, tomorrow I have a daylong job interview in which I will be talking to six separate people at this company.

Holy cow! Much interview~ma headed your way.

I just read the verb "to Nilly" for the first time this decade and laughed aloud.

YES!

It's been really nice to see the pixels of people who we've missed. Thanks for being a bright spot in a very dark period.

So this. Has anyone else had to step back and put usernames and real names together again?

user names and real names together

I'm keeping a list. I also have accepted a couple friend requests from people I recognize only by the pink gingham. I hadn't gotten a lot of Buffistas friended on FB because it's so overwhelming already and I see you all here. Here is better than FB.

I'm Elizabeth S. in RL, BTW.

Pix, I hope you heal quickly enough to run the marathon.

For those on Facebook, I'm Heather V.

I put out a few friends requests to people who had pink gingham icons or who had aLL known buffistas as mutual friends. I'm Allison E on real life.

I am so sorry, Strix!

I regret the circumstances, but it is so nice to see old faces like Betsy and Kathy A and katefate and to hear how things are going for them!

I crashed hard yesterday-- my stomach was off, so I stayed home from work, took a nap at one, and woke up this morning. I slept something like 18 hours. My cat ran around on top of me and I still went back to sleep without giving her her supper.

And I am Nadine T. in real life.

I am so sorry, Strix. Stupid crappy universe.

Also, I hope you have a good interview, Jessica.

I seem to have lost the ability to form coherent posts that are of interest, which is why I stopped posting as much. I am not sure why this is, and I feel this way about texts also. Maybe it is because I email SO MUCH in my work life?

So sorry, Strix.

~ma for you, Jessica.

I feel pretty good about the PhD interview I had yesterday. It helps knowing half the room and having your Master's advisor in there explicitly telling the committee that she'd like to be your doctorate advisor, too. (Just went and did some research on whether it should be advisor or adviser, and settled on advisor, though really I think I have my pick.)

Home sick today with a sore throat (and not enough sleep the past couple nights).

Good luck, Jess! Just keep focused, and you can do it.

Good luck to you, too, Kiba! Is this to get into a Ph.D. program?

That sounds very positive, Kiba. Continued good luck!