I felt bad for having positive emotions. It just feels wrong to be happy about anything so soon.
Nah, positive emotions are absolutely called for right now. But I do also understand the guilt.
It's fucking stupid that she's gone. It's fucking stupid and I hate it.
That's how I felt yesterday. Everything was stupid yesterday. The worst was that it was all so stupid in a petty way that I couldn't be roused to be overly emotional about either. All (or almost all) of my emotions belong to ita and you guys right now.
Omg, there is Jesse again with her supportive people are different bullshit. You and your rational logic consideration of others.
Omg, there is Jesse again with her supportive people are different bullshit. You and your rational logic consideration of others.
The nerve! You, on the other hand, are the nicest.
I jumped back into William Gibson's book Pattern Recognition because it has been the only book to ever fully capture the idea of an online message board community for me. A message board created and hosted by a regular person (A South Korean police officer) to discuss and dissect, obsessively, a series of evocative film snippets released one at a time by an unknown film maker via the internet.
Flame wars, off-topic discussions, big personalities and long-standing relationships/feuds/in jokes.
I wonder if Gibson ever lurked here or on TT or even the Bronze for that matter.
I just got an e-mail from my dad asking me what happened and was it someone he knew. He never reads FB and doesn't know about b.org (well, roughly, he knows I have online friends, just not where to find them).
Sigh. Now to craft a response.
Omg, there is Jesse again with her supportive people are different bullshit. You and your rational logic consideration of others.
The last thing we need to be doing right now is beating ourselves up over feelings! Sheesh.
Betsy, thank you for that. I've wondered how you've been (as well as your other family members who have migraines).
I get that addiction and drug diversion are huge problems; I'm certainly not downplaying that. But inadequately treating patients with chronic intractable pain should be considered malpractice. It's fucking criminal.
As long as I can beat you up, Jesse.
I'd like to legislate "ita's Law": If a doctor doesn't prescribe a person in pain adequate pain meds, they get a solid kick in the nads and tasered while they're down, and then two doctors stand over them, one to ask them to rate their pain on this frowny-face chart, and the other to write them a scrip for one Tylenol.
PLEASE create this on change.gov. I will sign it a million times.
