I had dinner this summer with someone who is either my 4th cousin once removed or my 5th cousin (it depends on who his mother is - I know who officially is but I have my doubts). He happens to summer in the same town my grandparents retired to, and happens to be a retired UGA professor, though he never met my grandparents or me before. I found him and emailed him because he has a companion miniature portrait to one my father has - a husband and wife pair who are our mutual ancestors.

"Oh, everyone knew that your grandmother was having an affair with the Jewish man who owned the pharmacy around the corner. He was your father's real father."

(it depends on who his mother is - I know who officially is but I have my doubts)

All that kind of family shit is so fascinating.

Well, my cousin was born in 1944. His mother was born in 1888. While it's within the realm of possibility that a 56 year old woman could have a baby, it seems rather more likely to me that the woman he considers his sister, who was born in 1916 and an unmarried theater professional in 1944, is his biological mother.

But you kind of can't ask that of a 70 year old man you've just met, can you?

It takes two or three generations (and deaths) till a family tragedy becomes an interesting anecdote. A friend of mine found out his great-grandfather was shot to death while robbing a bank. His grandmother had told the family that her father died in his sleep. He decided not to correct her, on the grounds that she would have been young enough at the time that it may well have been what the family told her.

My grandmother was born when her older sister was 18. Supposedly, her sister was completely embarrassed by this, because she figured that anyone looking at their family (with three kids, born 1899, 1909, and 1917) would assume that the baby was actually hers.

But you kind of can't ask that of a 70 year old man you've just met, can you?

Yeah, not so much.

And to Hil's point, I have wondered recently if the childhood friend I had with an older mother and grown siblings (by the time we were friends at age 11 or so) was actually the child of one of her sisters.

Although that family is all spread out! That seems legit. This one I knew was one with a bunch of kids clustered together and then one like 15 years later.

Speaking of having kids, a totally inappropriate note from my job: A coworker is currently pregnant with her seventh child, and I thought, "If anyone would have 7 kids in this day and age, it's someone named Mary [Irish Name] [Italian Name]."

It takes two or three generations (and deaths) till a family tragedy becomes an interesting anecdote.

And look! Another plot bunny is born.

Seven children? Better her than me, that's my reaction.

Speaking of, my young Morman cousin who got married in 2011 and had her first child a year later is now officially trying for the next one. Apparently she wants to catch up to her sisters-in-law (who have 5-7 kids each).

I think a "menopause baby" is not that unusual in general. I know a couple of people who are their parents' late "oops" kid and have much older siblings. But there's a difference in plausibility between a baby at 42 and a baby at 56!

How good is ancestry.com? I have a ton of info about both sides of my family and have always wanted to dig deeper. Is it worth the money?

If you know you'll have a block of time to focus on it, you can just pay for a month to so and get all the details. Once you have people in your tree you can access them after the paid time lapses--you just can't access any documentation.

I filled in my tree to the 1600s for some branches. Everything now calls for the international price, so I'm gonna hold off on that until I know I'll have time and energy to deal.

My dad did the Nat. Geo. DNA test, where they trace your DNA out of Africa. Finns have a weird path.