Oh! Sorry.

S. bought Dubliner white cheddar on sale the other day, so I think I'm having a baked potato with cheese for lunch.

my friend's seventh-floor walkup

Seventh! Good god. Six is as high as I was ever willing to go, but that was for living, not visiting.

Yeah, it's a lot. And then I keep climbing things! Today, the Arc de Triomphe. Also up to Sacre Coeur. Stairs and stairs. Ok, I guess I should motivate back up and out...

You'll be in great shape when you come home!

I've got to do something to counter all the bread and pastries!

So, I observed a weird interaction at the mailbox place yesterday and it has bothered me ever since.

I went in there to get a package and at the front desk was an elderly woman and her daughter and they were doing the paperwork to establish a mailbox there. For those of you who don't know, when you get a mailbox (like at a UPS store), you have to sign all kinds of paperwork (e.g. to make them your legal recipient for receiving mail) and they need id, etc.

The elderly woman was a bit confused. She was irritated and filling out all the paperwork and said out loud: "why do I need to fill all of this out?" "I don't want to do all of this."

Her daughter told her: "it is your choice if you don't want to fill all of it out, but I can't help you if we don't get a box. We need to open this box so I can help with arrangements for your care."

So I interpreted the situation as a woman who was irritated at the bureaucracy, a little confused, but the daughter was patient and she seemed to be doing what her daughter wanted her to. They were both talking to the attendant and with each other and the attendant was similarly patient.

I watched this for 10 minutes or so and another woman was in line before me. This other woman, before she went up to the 2nd counter, went over to the daughter, touched her on the arm and said something like: "you are a hero for doing this. I really understand what it is like to be dealing with this situation."

The daughter seemed uncomfortable with the woman's comment (and perhaps the touching?). But what got me is that her mother became really quiet. Before there was talking (and a lot of complaining, sure) but the mother didn't say anything after that.

I thought the stranger's interaction with the daughter was really dehumanizing for the mother. The mother was standing RIGHT THERE. And despite the fact that she was complaining and was a bit confused, she wasn't in la-la land. And the mother clearly understood she was being talked about when the stranger made the comment.

Before that moment, I was pretty empathetic for the daughter and thought she was doing a great job managing the situation. I had no thought to communicate that to her. After the stranger's interaction with her, I became much more sympathetic toward the mother. I wonder how often people treat her like she isn't there.

It certainly sounds like the stranger made a GIANT LEAP in thinking she knew enough about what was going on to comment. That ain't right.

I am working from home again today. I don't really feel terrible and I'm sure I'm not contagious, but...well, it just seemed easier. And I've got a dr's appt for Monday, where I expect to get a referral to an allergist and figure out wtf that reaction was all about. I cannot figure out what the trigger could have been, and it makes me nervous that I don't know what to avoid. I am pre-emptively taking Benadryl but I'm not gonna just take Benadryl every day for the rest of my life, just in case. Probably.

Did I tell you guys that my nephew was in Paris over winter break? His girlfriend's father is French and recently moved back there (not to Paris, but France) and they borrowed an apartment or something and invited him to visit for a couple of weeks. He was super impressed with the food (even McDonald's tastes good, reportedly) and the Eiffel Tower. And the smallness of the rooms. Jesse climbing all those stairs reminded me.

After the stranger's interaction with her, I became much more sympathetic toward the mother. I wonder how often people treat her like she isn't there.

If it's anything like my mom & grandma, a lot. It doesn't help that my grandma is tetchy and vocal, but - yeah. (Long story, but they're starting to explore hospice, and I really just wish they'd been able to move closer so I could help Mom.)

Wow, 7th floor walk-up is nuts--I'm not sure id leave the house at all, but definitely would only want to come and go once a day. I can't imagine!

Wasn't Our Trudy in a 5th floor walkup with her dog at one point?