flea, it is and insent.

Nora, he did cop to the fact that he's heard some hard truths from my coworkers and his friends and family. But yeah... it's not like HE's figured out how to get places on time. I feel pretty hurt, and the one thing I felt comfortable that I was good at (being the client point person) has been taken away from me on the next job. E is an introvert, and I respect that, but I don't know if there's a faster way to do something or if she thinks I need to spend less time doing x or more doing y if she doesn't tell me. Ugh.

sj, it fucking sucks. I so wish I were the type of person to pop awake and be awake. And that I was better with time. And and and...

{{{{{smonster}}}}} it does. I had both lunch and dinner plans the other day, and I was ridiculously late for both of them. I was always late for work when I worked in retail, unless I somehow managed to get their an hour early. There is no in between with me.

There is no in between with me.

OMG same here.

Okay, time to fold clothes and get stuff together for tomorrow.

Smonster, I know how awful those work conversations can be, but I think all you can do is take the criticism for what it is and move forward. You are doing everything right--my guess is that your coworkers feel awkward about it too and will be gracious about your email and resolve. I know it's hard though, being chronic ADD girl myself. I've gotten a lot better over the years, but it's always a struggle.

In similarly "bad brain!" news, my Pristiq ran out Friday and the mail order refill hasn't arrived. My pharmacy won't give me any to get me through the gap since my prescription has no refills (because the new script went to the mail order place), and I'm on day 2 or 3 of no meds. Having horrible brain zaps and general lack of ability to cope. The refill didn't even ship until Thursday, turns out, so I'm just crossing everything that I can get through work tomorrow and then get the refill in the mail.

smonster, the only solution I have - is rewarding yourself for being early. Not on time, early.

I had more , but it was all about me .

my love to everyone - things have been too rough around here - I hope things smooth out

Pix, that utterly sucks. I hope your meds arrive soon.

Hey, guess who's got insomnia and still can't stop crying? That would be me. I can't even take any Xanax (if I even have any) for fear it'll fuck me up for the morning.

Thanks to all for your compassion and wise counsel. I'm flipping among anger, shame, fear, and defensiveness. I hope i can keep the anger and defensiveness in check and just buckle down and focus. I'm trying to give myself a few days to let the emotions settle so I can figure out what if any of the anger is justified and what if anything I want to do about it.

beth, rewards have never worked for me, and just now I'm thinking it's because they also require consistency? I guess it would be a chane to practice being consistent. It just can't be money or food. I don't fucking know.

I am very sleepy, so I can't quite parse how best to say supportive things, smonster. Bra. That's all I've got. So lots of bras to you and may they be pretty since practical has already been covered better than I can do.

Heh. If someone doesn't want hugs or hairpats, we can at least give them bras for support. Or cups, depending on the gender in need of support.

Not tonight - but give yourself a written list of cons and pros for being late and on time. (there are pros to being late and there are cons to being on time)

and I might start with stickers. - it might sound silly -- but seeing stickers on a calendar - on days when you do what you want/need to do might help. and it is not also a giant disappointment if you don'[t get one. If you worked in a library - I'd have my coworkers do it . but librarians are like that . and there are always stickers at the library .