We're having Father's day brunch this year again, and I am apparently a control freak. I hate asking people to bring things because I want things just so. I e-mailed someone about bringing finger rolls and she agreed to bring bulky rolls. I don't want bulky rolls. Why, yes I am completely insane, why do you ask?

I decided a long time ago not to ever have potlucks at my house after a couple of disasters where people in charge of bringing crucial items flaked. I can't deal with the unpredictability. I am also kind of weird in that I don't like serving things (such as chips or dips) in their store containers or bags, so... Yeah. My parties are expensive to throw because I supply everything, but I have a blast and usually have leftovers (that I like) for a week afterwards. So, I feel you in the control-freakness aspect, but nobody gets hurt and it's all good.

My parties

Are wonderful. And relaxing and a delight to attend. End stop.

Niecephews adorable. Gosh, twins are exhausting.

So this is my life, and I don't know why I continue to be surprised when this happens:

My bridal shower is today, in less than 2 hours, in one part of town.

Dad called and left a message at 8:30 (I was asleep, duh) saying that he "didn't feel right" and got sent home from work yesterday because he kept forgetting what he was supposed to do, so he was calling the ambulance and going to the hospital, in the total opposite part of town.

Dad's not answering his cell phone, which I understand, but he ALSO has no idea how to retrieve voice mail messages from it, so there's no point in leaving a message.

I am 100% willing to run to the hospital right now if he's in critical condition. And if he's not, I'm 100% willing to go to the hospital right after the shower.

But I can't fucking get ahold of him to find out. So I don't even know what to do. I have to leave in a little over an hour, so I have to get in the shower right now. And wittering on about, oh my bridal shower! Oh, my special day! Oh, I need to get ready for it! makes me feel like the absolute worst horrible dick daughter on the planet.

Yay.

Augh, Steph. Can you call the hospital?

Also, you are not the worst daughter on the planet. You're a wonderful daughter with lots of crazy stuff going on at the same time.

Okay, he answered the cell phone, and he sounds to me like he normally sounds when he's taken too many painkillers -- really slow speech and kind of addled and repeating things. I can't actually tell how he is. I don't think he's in critical condition right now, but what if I'm wrong?

Can Tim or even better someone else (ideally on that side of town) run by the hospital and scope things out?

I second both suggestions. Call the hospital to find out his status, and see if Tim or someone else can go and check things out in person. You will be able to relax more and enjoy your shower if someone trusted lays eyes on your dad.

Also, I'm sorry for the complications. You are great daughter. My mom went into the hospital for Bobby's graduation, and it was easier to focus on the local events when I had other people checking on her and giving me updates.

We live about 20-30 minutes west of the hospital. My Dad's siblings live about 30-40 minutes east of the hospital, and aren't in great health (that said, if it were critical, they'd be there).

I'm it. For all practical purposes short of him literally being in the process of dying, I'm his support system. Which is hard and unfair and sucks, but it is what it is.

I'm going to have to go out there after the shower and see what's going on.

I had hoped it was low blood sugar, but he says that the pharmacist at his work checked his blood sugar and BP yesterday and they were normal, and that the EMTs checked both this morning and they were normal.

He recently (past month or so) had a dose of a medication he takes for diabetic nerve pain increased to about triple what it was. He says that for the first time in years, the pain is gone. But I think -- it's an antiepileptic medication used off-label for neuropathic pain, successfully -- that it has the unfortunate side effects of dizziness, confusion, etc.

If that's all this is, I will be so fucking grateful. Although it SUCKS BALLS that something that finally got Dad's pain under control (it's pretty bad when unmedicated) has such severe side effects he can't take that dose.

I am going to lose my fucking mind, okay?

Okay, Tim is going to go to the hospital, and I gave him a list of all of Dad's medications, along with the dose change for the one for his nerve pain, and a list of known side effects of that medication.

And I am still in a bathrobe and have to be at the shower in 25 minutes, so I'd better let my aunt know I'll be a little late.

Someone better hand me a fucking mimosa as soon as I walk in that place.