You wanted a grown-up to act like a grown-up. That is a valid expectation for grown-ups to have.

This.

It's rough that your roommate's going through a bad time, but that doesn't obligate you to carry him financially, especially when you're also going through a bad time.

Very much so. I haven't lived rent-free (not even with my mother) since I was 18. It's not out of line for you to expect him to live up to agreed-upon obligations, and it is COMPLETELY out of line for him to be so in-arrears to you. Sure 26 is young-ish, but it's still adult. He should act like it.

I hope he understands that simply moving out doesn't mean he doesn't owe you money anymore. Ugh.

Sean,

small claims?

I hope he understands that simply moving out doesn't mean he doesn't owe you money anymore. Ugh.

I remember being 26. It wouldn't surprise me. When I told him how it needed to be in order for this to keep working out, he seemed confused that he still owed me so much. I brought out the piece of paper I'd been tracking everything on and showed it to him. He disappeared into his room for a while and came back saying, "Yeah, you're right. I guess you've got to carry that one..."

I did not say, "No fucking kidding I'm right. I'm very fucking aware of the fact that I'm right. Thank you for confirming the rightness of my being right."

small claims?

I'm hoping it doesn't have to come to that. While this has probably ended what passed for a friendship between us, I don't feel the need to press the issue just yet.

Knowing that he's leaving, I might be able to get some personal leniency from my landlord. He's aware who the problem child in the relationship is, and flat out said to me yesterday that I should kick the guy out and find somebody who can afford to pay.

Because, like a grown up, I do actually talk to my landlord and tell him what's going on with me.

Good for you, for talking to the landlord. Because avoiding doesn't help anyone. And good for you, for talking to roomie. Hopefully, he will cough up some cash before leaving. By chance, do you have a written lease of some sort? Tracking his payments was also very good. That will help, if you need to take it to small claims.

Ugg. Really wish this wasn't all happening to you right now.

Way back when I had a friend who decided that since she didn't want to be friends with a mutual acquaintance she no longer needed to pay said acquaintance the several hundred dollars she owed. And then she said, "We're not friends anymore--why does she keep calling me about money?" I suggested a fool proof way to make the calls stop, but apparently paying her debts was just crazy talk. She was in her 20s at the time. I decided I needed better friends not long after.

Sean, I hope your roommate pays up, and quickly.

By chance, do you have a written lease of some sort?

All verbal, but quite straightforward and as you say, I have the written records to accompany it. Even though my landlord lets me take on a roommate, the lease doesn't actually allow me to sublet the room, so I believe I can't actually have a written agreement. But I'm also pretty certain the simple verbal agreement is enforceable, especially with the written record.

And frankly, that's why whatever friendship we had is pretty much toast over this. Too much abuse of my trust.