Sean, I think you're right, that your parent's retirement from the workforce feels like a transition between "they take care of you" to "you take care of them", and it can feel a little scary. I hope you're able to find a calm place to contemplate from.

Jilli, I'm glad you feel good about your path. I'm sorry that you have a pissy, petty Umbridge in your life, but I'm glad you've got a plan to be rid of her presence, and that you've got the tools to keep her from writing the narrative.

Ginger, sorry for the vermin invasion, good luck dealing. No fun.

WindSparrow, sounds like you have every reason to be a little irked with this person. Thankfully, since you do have a safe space to vent (i.e., here), I'm sure you'll be able to behave with professionalism around this person (no matter how much you'd like to kick her in the shins...or maybe that's me projecting).

bonny, hope you continue to heal well, and that FF gets the hint and stops trying to take advantage of your good nature.

And now my work vent - found out that someone complained about me. The deal is that I assign access to one of our programs, but because the software contains some info that could be military application, I have to be aware if someone is a foreign national to know what level of access they get. When we had an HR manager on site this was not a problem, I'd ask her, she'd say they're x or y, no problem. Unfortunately, Corporate, in their infinite wisdom, decided we don't need onsite HR and let her go in the 2nd or 3rd wave of layoffs a couple years ago. So now I have to find out locally - without access to personnel files, and without asking to see passports or birth certificates, because technically I shouldn't have access to any of those things. So I have to go through a couple of layers of people who do have access to files. If it's a temp or contractor (as more and more are lately), I have to go through layers at the agencies. Now I never ask to see the evidence, always just request confirmation from the person who did, never gossip about anyone, and did I mention am required by Corporate and the Government to ask for the info? But someone has complained that I asked. Now there's no way that I can get into trouble for this, but it just pisses me off that this task that's a giant pain in the patoot, that I'd rather not have to do anyway, but I do because it's required legally - somebody complains about me doing it! Just as well I don't know who, partly because I'm irked and partly because I'd probably be looking at them side-eye wordering what they're trying to hide. Anyway, just needed to get that out - and I do feel better for the vent.

The deal is that I assign access to one of our programs, but because the software contains some info that could be military application, I have to be aware if someone is a foreign national to know what level of access they get.

That's a big deal, too. That's the kind of things that companies get fined for, by the government, and they don't joke around.

That's a big deal, too. That's the kind of things that companies get fined for, by the government, and they don't joke around.

Exactly. We just had a meeting the other day about export control, and it's kind of a big deal that we are the only division that's never been fined for a violation. So like I said, I can't get in trouble because someone complained. It's just really annoying that someone complained about a job that I find annoying and cumbersome, as if I'm doing it just to get my jollies (especially after we just had this meeting 2 DAYS AGO).

Hi bonny! I'm glad you continue to improve. I second Kate's recommendation that you inform FF that due to your still-healing injuries you'll be unable to take care of her neighbor's cat in his absence. Don't suggest she do it, just let her know you'll not. And hugs. And soup.

Is it too hot for hugs and soup in Georgia? Because I want Ginger to have some, too. Are there local exterminators who guarantee their work? Because that may be the only way to go. Rats are nasty and scary, even when you have a Peabody to alert and defend you. And somehow it made me feel guilty for having them in the house, even though the invasion wasn't because of negligence or carelessness. Let the pros handle this one, if you possibly can.

Sean, hugs and soup? Would they help? I recall all too well that sudden feeling of descending responsibiltiy. In my case coupled with the four-year-old's insistence that she was perfectly capable and I couldn't do that--she wasn't and I not only could, but I had to, but facts didn't circumvent the arguments. You know, you've handled a lot and survived a lot. You're a mensch. You're going to do okay, and be fine.

Windsparrow, other people's wilful myopia never fails to confound me. Making decisions without learning the facts is stupid and I'm sorry you had to deal with that.

Anybody else? Epic? Soup? Clam chowder to borscht to beef-barley-veg, your choice. With complementary hugs.

Can you do me a lactose-free Chicken-Corn chowder? That would get you worship-level appreciation from me!

With a hug on the side? Manna from heaven (except that the actual descriptions of manna do not sound that tasty, just sustain-y, so really even better than that).

I'm so grateful to have never had a flea problem in this house. Mice, ants, termites, aphids, flies and long-legged crawly things, yes. Fleas, no.

Thanks for the good thoughts. I took care of the cats because everyone left town, so there wasn't anyone to hand it off to.

The nice bit was that there is a teeny, tiny, ohmygoodness adorable kitten that I did not see last weekend. She came out to play and totally made me smile.

One of the two cats must not be well though. Nothing ended up in the litterbox, if you know what I mean. Ugh.

Nothing ended up in the litterbox, if you know what I mean.

Was it close to the box? Sometimes Toke's ass hangs out the door of the box and the results are unpleasant. So it could just be a lazy cat rather than a sick one.

Or a very fastidious one -- some cats will not poop in a box that isn't clean enough, and I have known of a cat that basically needed its litter changed every day or else it would poop on the floor. One kitty generally doesn't poop enough in one day to require a litter change every day, but this kitty was a diva.

Steph has a point, one of my cats regularly goes next to the box (then crumples up the rug as if she's still trying to cover it). But it's not health, it's attitude. (Gotta say though, at least with an attitude problem the ahem consistency is more easily dealt with than a health problem).

She clearly expects me to help her out emotionally, but I just don't have it right now.

...or ever. Honestly.

I'm a little emotionally overwhelmed right now. Nothing bad really, just life. I'm reading and sympathizing and sending vibes, but I'm not up to engaging much. I love it that Buffistas are there and I can feel like I have good people around even when I can't stand having people around, you know?

Yeah, my cats used to do that back in the waaay back days. And, I would not put it past my former friend to have not scooped the pan every day...or twice a day, like I do.

The piles were in the same room, but not close enough to be a near miss situation, and one of the was super soft.

Hopefully, the family will be home tonight or tomorrow, so they can determine what is up.

I left a detailed note.