{{{Smonster}}} I'm sorry you're feeling that way.

Bonny, I'm sorry that your former friend is being such an asshat. She needs to pay the whole bill.

I need some advice from the buffista parents for a friend of mine. Her 5 year old is starting kindergarten soon and they went to a gathering with the other kids who were going to be in his class. A couple of the kids were pushing him around, and now he doesn't want to start school. He's been in the same daycare/preschool since he was little, but this school has all new kids.

smonster, I don't know what words might be of use to you right now. You ARE stressed out. I wish it were some easy way of coating stressors in protective casing so they hurt less - like an oyster with a grain of sand. Telling you the secret of it would be a delight right now, but I do not know it. But do please know that we are here, 100% on your side.

smonster, can you work -- I mean literally, are you *able* to work, physically, and SAFELY -- if you take a Xanax (or half, or a quarter)? A desk job is not going to be treacherous if the person takes a Xanax and does some typing, but I know your job often involves heavy, pointy, ouchy things.

So if you can safely work with a little Xanax in you, I recommend that.

DC law would probably not hold this woman legally accountable for the bites (it's weak on owner responsibility). Morally, this woman should pay, and she should be apologizing all over the place. Legally, she's probably off the hook.

The logical part of my brain finds this interesting and a little confusing (so, basically, no one bears responsibility if their dog is an evil overlord?), but the emotional part of my brain is all THE HELL, YOU SAY. Dang, DC. Dang.

Right now I'm trying to get myself out of my house and into the car to go back to work. I have to go. My drugs are there, my computer is there, I carpooled with my coworker this morning.

I could probably take 1/4 or 1/2 Xanax and work. It seems to be less effective when pain is part of the anxiety trigger. I've been lying on my back using Alexander technique, which helps some - but as soon as I sit up the pain comes raring back.

Thanks for the brackets and support. Gonna do five more minutes AT and then head back.

But I agree that it's a pattern, and I wonder if part of it comes from equating "caring" with being there for, well, anything. Which isn't necessary or even really caring. It's absolutely a pattern you know how to recognize in dogs and owners, but it's worth applying to people relationships too. Your boundaries are sacred, and they just need a little shoring up right now.

Yeah, that does seem like something to look into. (I mean, I feel like I veer too far the other way, which is an issue also, but)

DC law would probably not hold this woman legally accountable for the bites (it's weak on owner responsibility). Morally, this woman should pay, and she should be apologizing all over the place. Legally, she's probably off the hook.

Hey, knowledge is power! We love you Sparky, don't worry! :)

DC law would probably not hold this woman legally accountable for the bites (it's weak on owner responsibility).

Four year old girl, teeth to face, no owner slap on the wrist? Y'all should become part of the United States. There are downsides, but still.

My dog has delusions of grandeur, and I think if he finds out about DC, he might move there to become an evil overlord.

Get ready to worship Kato, the canine god of peanut butter.

no one bears responsibility if their dog is an evil overlord?

DC does have a dog bite law, but DC applies contributory negligence (rather than comparative) so if Bonny's injuries were found to be at all the result of her own actions she would be barred from recovery.

ETA: I am not a DC lawyer and I am only dipping my toe in here.

Is she aware that if it had been a stranger that the possiblility of her dog being put down is high?

That is a fucking excellent point.

Ironically, as she was driving me to the Minute Clinic, she asked why I didn't want to go to the ER. I specifically steered us away from that option because the ER is mandated to report all dog bites. The Minute Clinic wouldn't even treat me. The private health clinic didn't care. Weirdly, I didn't even fill out any paperwork...except signing the credit card receipt, of course.

I didn't now that DC law is lenient because, in two situations, one where the dog was immediately put down, (against my better judgement) and more recent one where I took responsibility for keeping the animal on our service, Animal Control was pretty severe.

In fact, when that client dog bit one of our walkers, Animal Control came to take a report and I had to sign an affidavit saying that, as the responsible party for the company, I certified that we were not going to take the option of having the dog put down...which was absolutely on the table, despite the fact that that bite was much less severe than mine.

The clients feel all over themselves to pay the walkers medical bill, they were so grateful for your discretion.

Truly, my former friend really is lucky that it was me. My concern now is that the dog has ready and easy access to a three year old. I just can't see it going well.

But there is NO WAY in which you were negligent in this situation.

One of the bizarre upsides of this whole circus of pain is that I was rock.fucking.solid through the whole thing. I didn't scream. I didn't harm the dog. I did everything I teach others to do.

Even when the artery got punctured and blood was fountaining out of my hand...by fountaining, I mean a two inch arc...just like you see on tv ...I literally said to myself, "I'm going to go into shock pretty soon. Huh. I should prepare for that."

When I asked my hapless neighbor, god bless him, if he could leash up the dog who was totally calm by this point, he took one look at me...and the blood all over both dogs...and whispered, "no." I have to chuckle now because, dude, I understand!

In an even more bizarre story...I tried to refer a problem client to the bull dog specialist who came to help me with Cagney in the beginning.

This is the 'just fix him' client.

The trainer said that she took a dog in a similar situation where they dropped him off for a week's worth of intensive training. A few hours later DC Animal Control showed up to confiscate the dog because the owners declared him dangerous and wanted him destroyed.

The trainer said she cried, offered to buy the dog, and did everything she could to save him, but no one would listen.

She changed her policy about 'training camp' and won't ever put herself in that situation again. I'm still gobsmacked.