Just emailed back smonster--I think it sounds pretty good!

Therapy was... partly me venting about politics and then coming to some personal realizations. Crying a lot.

Then I went to the grocery store (and cried in the grocery store) but my shopping done and did not have a single moment of anxiety about being in the actual store (a big deal).

And I realized some other things - emailed my therapist so we can talk about it next week and then also shared with Mom...who was supportive.

But wait there is more! I called Verizon and talked to them about my phone and the disconnecting wireless and he guy was relaly nice and figured out it's as software failure and I'm resetting my phone.

askye, you're adulting! congratulations!

Adulting Tuesday, let's make it a thing. My adulting was self care and getting my arse to the rec center to work out. I feel so much better - I guess I'm finding those workout endorphins. I always thought that was a myth (at least I have never felt a runner's-high {walker's-high}?).

My mission is to preserve and promote beautiful things, ideas, and people.

Oh, smonster, I _love_ this. Well done you.

Moving toward beauty, rather than from pain, might be more fun.

I've been swamped...like feeling like drowning...lately, but I'm coming up for air now.

I wonder where you could find a woman who supports the arts, or social justice, who needs an assistant who moves around, serves as a conduit between that person and other people doing good, and helps to deliver/formulate plans.

Not behind a desk.

Oh, smonster, I _love_ this. Well done you.

Well, I would never have come up with it without your help. I like that it covers my love of pop culture, feminism, pimping stuff I like, recycling, preservation, etc.

And I'm glad you are starting to feel a little less overwhelmed. Have things settled down with the angry ex-client?

Also, that's an interesting idea, I will ponder. I do know some folks involved in the arts here, they might have ideas.

Had lunch with current boss today. Failing anything else, he about has me talked into transitioning from working for him to starting my own thing. I have a colleague at my other job who is also contemplating starting a preservation contracting company, so we could potentially team up, but our personalities don't mesh that great right now, and we don't spend that much time together. We g t along much better than we did when she first joined the company, though. Gotta choose an underserved niche… if this pocket door thing goes well this weekend, that's a possibility.

Oh my god WHY does he push my buttons so hard? When I fuck up and I tell him I fuck up he's like, well, figure out how you can avoid making that mistake again. And it takes everything I have not to yell (or text) NO SHIT, SHERLOCK. So I gently ask him to give me specific feedback instead as that is redundant and he's given it many times, and he gets all snarky with me. And part of it is my frustration with myself, but in this instance I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA why I did it this way because it was two fucking months or more since I worked on this thing and that time gap was not in my control in any way.

Jesus fucking Christ, this is why even though I appreciate his support I am hesitant to have his help building my own business. I would rather just cut all business ties immediately and return to our previous mentorship/friendship. But he's willing to let me borrow his tools while I slowly buy my own, and that is huge.

thank you for y'all's patience with my mememe and venting.

I'm sorry the communications issues have been so great, smonster. It really does sound like both sides wanted it to work. That is very cool to be able to borrow tools, no small thing at all.

And I'm glad you are starting to feel a little less overwhelmed. Have things settled down with the angry ex-client?

So far, so good. It's been a month since the cease and desist letter went out and he claimed that harassment is his first amendment right. Plus, his house sold for bonkers bucks. Maybe he is drunk on money.

Partnership could be good, but not with these characters, eh?

Pocket doors!? You could make a fortune in this neighborhood.

Specialized, specific and spendy. Sounds good.