Thanks y'all. Some great suggestions all. For now, I'm ok with the rifle in the house. It can't be fired. I do want the bolt under my control. We have some good friends who do belong to a gun range, so I'll ask them for some ideas.

Both CJ and K-Bug are kinda stuck in the "Mom, Dad, and B are all being so mean to the bf. They are the grown ups and should just fix it". But it isn't that easy. K-Bug has, for whatever reason, decided she loves this guy. I tried to shine light on the things I see as being damaging and she just refuses to see that.

If the bf (I won't tell you what that stands for in my head) didn't like what I told her and had come to me to talk, I would have gained some respect for him. I started this whole process with "I would love him to prove me wrong". But every action just confirms all the things that make my gut ache.

I hate that this whole mess has put distance between K-Bug and the rest of the family since that is one of his ploys - pulling her away from everyone she knew before him. But I'm really at a loss for what else to do at this point. I raised my concerns to her. I said my peace. She is an adult and will do what she will. Just breaks my heart.

Everyone, I get that we're upset at the situation with the gun, Suzi, and CJ. Suzi has said she is comfortable with his demeanor and attitude about and around guns. Her issue is with how the gun came to be in the house. Can we focus on the boyfriend's lack of respect instead?

My suggestion about the gun club was intended to be about asserting control over the situation without the need to take the gun away. Since she is comfortable with CJ having a gun then I think the issue is about showing that it's still according to her house rules, and not ones set by the BF or by CJ. He can keep the gun, and use it, and if it is stored offsite then the firing mechanism and ammunition can also be accessible, but in a way that Suzi can exert final control.

eta x-post with Suzi.

Wasn't directed at anyone in particular, ND. Your suggestion is a good one. I was trying to be broad, because I think the fact that a rifle is involved makes the conversation more fraught. Feelings run high on the issue of firearms. I came into the conversation later and read it all in one shot.

My apologies if I've offended anyone.

I appreciated it Maria, no worries. If it were a handgun, it would be a totally different conversation.

I wish science would come up with a vaccine that makes women immune to jerks.

ANd now I'm off to the doctor to see if we can figure why my foot still hurts - almost up to 2 months of pain now. Joy. Just one more thing on my list of CRAP.

Sunday - we leave for vacation on Sunday. Can't come soon enough.

I hate that this whole mess has put distance between K-Bug and the rest of the family since that is one of his ploys - pulling her away from everyone she knew before him.

Ugh, that is such a red alert. I'm sorry things are rough, Suzi.

I hope the doc figures it out, Suzi.

Ginger, that would be a wonderful thing. I'd even take it as a shot. And I hate needles.

My apologies if I've offended anyone.

None taken by me. I agree that it is a very charged issue, and a tricky one to discuss in the best circumstances. Personally I've extremely anti gun, but in this case it isn't so much about the gun, as it is about who is asserting power and control.

Ginger, that would be a wonderful thing. I'd even take it as a shot. And I hate needles.

Amen. Speaking of shots, I got cortisone shot in a different spot. Hopefully this does the trick. At least he isn't suggesting the electro shock therapy thing anymore.