Suzi, so much ~ma for your cousin. I love the idea of the boa for the IV pole!

Teppy, I'm sorry to hear about your car AC. Why do cars seem to have a 6th sense for when we don't have the money to fix them, and then break? Evil money suckers.

I had all the sleep last night and didn't leave any for tonight. Silly me. Also I'm fairly certain that I am still not pregnant, so I need to suck it up and make a follow up appointment with the fertility doctor tomorrow. Please no one tell me stories about someone they know having triplets between now and then.

Maybe it might just need a freon charge? I'm sorry Teppy.

Much ~ma for your cousin, Suzi.

but not play them in my head as an endless anxiety loop.

I would love to learn how not to do this. Sometimes I can stop myself, but others... well.. I just can't.

Speaking of, I got some really crappy news tonight and it's taking a good bit to not go down that anxiety loop. Don't want to get into detail just yet, but looks like another family member has cancer. Not sure how bad it is as tests are still inconclusive, so trying not to borrow trouble.

~ma for your cousin, Suzi, and your family, Burrell.

Steph, I wish you the opposite of the "Old Chinese Curse" - I hope you will very soon be living in "Less Interesting Times". Good luck, coping-ma.

Dear The Universe, when I've said that I like the British NHS, I didn't mean that I would like a near relative to get to experience it. The day before we're leaving. Sigh. My brother has foot/leg issues, so health-ma would be appreciated.

I can't do this. I can't get through today. I can't stop crying long enough to get ready to go to work. I feel like I'm being crushed.

Can you take the day off? Hang with Kato and put off dealing for a day?

Teppy, I agree with brenda, take a sick day if you can.

I can't. There's too much to do, because of the clusterfuckery way the post-sale transition has been handled (as in, I wasn't told until late Monday afternoon that the new publisher needs 10 years' worth of files, some of which had to be re-created, and their ftp site won't give me permission to upload the files and our contact person -- someone with the title "Senior Journal Transition Manager" -- has no idea how to fix the ftp problem so I have to send 64 separate e-mails with attached files today), and 10 years' worth of physical files need to be cleaned out so we can send the hard-copy copyright forms to the new publisher -- 10 years of 17 journals per year, 25-30 articles per journal, 1-10 authors per article, all of whom have an individual copyright form -- and no one except my department is going through the files, even though we have a whole company full of people who could help but just...aren't. And tomorrow is supposed to be our last day.

I don't know how that's going to happen. And I can't stop crying to get out the door to go continue trying to dig out from the clusterfuckery.

Steph, so what if there's all that to do? It will get done, whether you're there or not, if it needs doing. It's not all on your shoulders. At this point, I don't think you owe them anything. You certainly don't need to sacrifice your mental health.

At least give yourself permission to go in later, and you do what you can, not try to do everything.