I don't think you're overly sensitive, bonny, you're just aware, and it bothers you. Most people would *tsk* and forget about it, and not think twice about what it means for the culture at large.

But you know, there will always be people who think they should be treated like the most noble and delicate of princesses. More and more, people from that most privileged demographic are gonna hafta get used to interacting with people who are not like them, and most people will figure out how not to be an ass, and some people will continue to be precious princesses regardless of how much they hear about that "tolerance" business.

I'd say, just focus on how well the person was able to do the job she was given, and how well she handled the difficulties that arose. If she did well enough, then great; if not, then recommend whatever you think is best for her and for the job. Forget about what the princesses think; they are not important except as being one of the difficulties the job includes. Every job includes dealing with difficult people. Did she handle those situations well, or not? How much help did she need, and do you have resources to provide that help? That's all.

Zen, you've helped me to make a decision. I don't like my decision, but it is the one that I think is best for this woman and for myself.

I DO worry about the culture at large...I really do. I sometimes remind myself of Andi McDowell at the beginning of Sex, Lies and Videotape. "I worry about the trash."

I don't know if I will ever stop doing so. And I will continue to do whatever I can to champion what I think is right.

Having said that, I can only do so on a one-on-one basis.

The one person, beside myself, that I can influence is this worker. I will ask the Board to choose a quieter precinct for her. I think she deserves to work if she wants to. I don't know that boredom will be any better for her than being abused by entitled folks, but it WILL make it easier on me.

No guarantee that I'll replace this situation something better, but like the woman on facebook, I just feel that I am irresponsible if I don't say something.

One recommendation is to have a helper stay with this lady to help keep her calm. I know the BOE can't do this because they frankly just don't have enough workers/volunteers for the jobs required.

She may have access to a companion who could be with her. There is a group of developmentally disabled people who come to my gym to walk around the track, and there are companions who walk with them. Tim's aunt has Down syndrome, and she lives in a group home that has employees who can accompany her on certain outings.

I don't know if it's too complicated for you to suggest that to the BOE (well, not too complicated for you to suggest -- that's a simple sentence or two -- but possibly too complicated for them to follow up on).

Several people have made the same recommendation, Steph. I think it is a good one.

I will definitely include that in my comments to the BOE. I fear they will not follow up.

I do have the woman's email address, which she doesn't use much, but I've been unsure if it would be insulting for me to say such a thing to her directly.

It seems clear that she has been through a training program (repetitive responses to similar stimulus), so having a helper may not be a radical suggestion.

If your relationship with her has previously included making such suggestions through her personal email, then maybe. If not, then don't. If it's not a radical suggestion, she or someone looking out for her has probably already thought of it, and anyway, that's (probably) not your job. It's not all on you to help her (even if it feels like it sometimes!).

Lotta "if" in this post.

That's the hard bit. I know it isn't on me, but the impulse to help is strong.

For instance, the dog from last week that nearly bit the walker's face? Today, I spent an hour trying to find a veterinary behaviorist for them, event though they aren't clients any more. I just feel terrible when it seems there is no help, or when others easily give up.

I've been accused of being too helpful. I really don't want to bug people. I just don't feel good leaving people/things in need.

My older brother was in town this weekend. We went out to dinner last night, along with our respective firstborns and our youngest brother. (They chose a restaurant directly across the street from my office, which was unexpected.) He's landed a full-time job, which is nice. Good that Ryan has the chance to spend time with some of his extended family too. (It meant that he was up an hour after his bedtime, though.)

Alas, our poor little boy has been feeling sick. Bad cough again, as usual. He's had swollen tonsils as long as I can remember now, but the doctors all seem to think the surgery is worse than the frequent respiratory infections. A couple of nights ago he managed to cough up a truly prodigious quantity of phlegm all over his shirt. Seriously, he looked like he was fresh off the set of Ghostbusters. I hope he's feeling better today.

I also think it's reasonable to expect a civil environment in a voting context. Politics are fraught enough as it is, and people are tense. I think it's reasonable to not expect to feel yelled at when I'm trying to exercise my duties.

I'm with you Liese.

I can say that a number of people went out of their way to thank me/us for doing our civic duty. They were no, sadly, in the majority.

It's a thing of glory that we do not live in a country where one has to camp out for a week and/or risk life and limb to exercise this particular privilege. Few people in my sphere of influence seem to realize this.

I'm off to exercise another thing of glory...soaking in my tub.

Cheers for the good thoughts all, and for being part of a place where I can seek thoughtful support/reality about things like this!

Posting on my phone was a fail. I apparently clicked unsubscribe instead of post.

Run around all over day. Went to the nursery to pick up 92 plants to finish the landscaping for the house. One of the very last things to do before putting up the sign. Yay!

Then off to the doctor with Bobby. Both ears infected. Bad. Got drugs and put him to bed. It came on super quick. He only complained of having a cold yesterday and then after he showered this morning one ear bothered him. By noon both were super bad. I went off some on the front desk person and manager. I asked that the charge be reversed on the card I gave her and moved to the HSA card. They acted like I was ruining their lives or kicking their dog or something. And there was not a single person in the waiting room so it wasn't like they were busy. Sorry to inconvenience you and take you away from your Facebook or whatever ladies. Grumble.

The change in personality thing where I have little patience or tolerance still comes as a big surprise to me when it happens. Well, hopefully they will learn that patients are customers and not always in the best mood.

Then I stopped by my eye doctor who totally gets how to make you feel like you are being cared for. He gave me a set of contacts about a month ago to try out and see how they worked for me. When I stopped today I explained that I was good near for reading books or close things and far was good, but not my computer monitors. I have a rack of 4 monitors and they are maybe 3-4 feet away from where I am sitting and I find myself either leaning forward or having to blow up the screen resolution. He totally understood what I was talking about and gave me another set to try out and let him know. Thank you!