That's impressive, ~t!

For me, making swimming as much of a priority as say, sleep....or eating.... getting dressed in the morning? means that even when things are batshit insane, it's got its spot carved out anyway. Of course, established this routine when I was not crazed, or at least not that much. And I'm a creature of routine. It calms me down, a reset of sorts, at the same time giving me a reserve of energy that was spent by the time I leave work.

Even when my times suck and everything is hurting and I break from routine and only do a mile because I am fucking starving and sore and figure I need to give my muscles a bit of a break, cause they are pissed and it is late because of a storm. Like tonight.

Also? My shoulders and arms are awesome. A little vanity is fun too.

The fitness is just bonus.

The funny thing is, I look in the mirror and I can't see a difference. Not that I think I look bad or fat, but I didn't particularly think that before, either. I've just always figured I look pretty okay and like me and I still do.

But all my clothes fit differently (or are just plain too big, really), so there's been a change.

I was swimming every morning from 5:00 to 5:30 for a good two months last fall and it was awesome. Then I got sick and fell off the wagon. Slowly getting back on it now, finally.

Clothing is often tell-tale for me as well. A coworker asked me today if I've lost weight recently. Scale says no, clothes are giving non-answers (things are fitting weird. I'm having bra issues I can't quite define.) I was wearing a short, fitted skirt, showing a lot of leg and he probably just hasn't seen me in that recently since mostly I wear slacks or skirts or dresses that hit me at the knee. But it gave me a nice pause.

It calms me down, a reset of sorts, at the same time giving me a reserve of energy that was spent by the time I leave work.

Yeah, what sarameg said. I listen to funny podcasts while I exercise and I don't think about anything else for that block of time. Maybe I'll consider what to make for dinner, but mostly I focus completely on what I'm doing in the moment. I feel better and I'm more relaxed after. So now I make the time.

Counting laps pretty much renders me incapable of holding complicated thought for a sustained period. It's a nice respite from my brain. eta: I do a lot of simple math, factoring and fractions. And trivial imaginings that don't involve introspection or angst.

I did totally get out of the habit of lifting weights and yoga when I dislocated my hand last year and it took so long to heal. Now I'm struggling to work that back into my routine.

Working out really does help the stress, even if you are me, and have no endorphin rush from it.

If you do get endorphin rushes from it, I hate you and want to be you.

If you do get endorphin rushes from it, I hate you and want to be you.

I don't get endorphin rushes from running, except maybe once every few months when I'm particularly fit. I wouldn't say it's enough to keep me going, not even a little.

But I do feel better, generally, when I exercise regularly. I am a happier person in my life if I get some exercise, and between that and my sister waiting for me three times a week, that's enough to get me out the door.

I am amazed that, even unemployed, I got up at 5:40 AM today to go running. But if I don't, my sister probably won't run either, and I shouldn't punish her for my bad job luck.