Oh, JZ, that's heartbreaking. I dread having that conversation with Rose, though I'm sure we will, many times over.

edit: I misspoke (mistyped), because I'm sure it won't be the same conversation in many of the details, but it makes me so preemptively sad to think that one day she'll get the cultural message that something about her body or her looks isn't "good enough," even though she's the most gorgeous creature that ever lived. (You know, besides Matilda, and every other Buffista sprog.)

I just really didn't think that conversation would have to start so soon.

I knew I was odd when I hit kinder. Really, just shy, but I internalized odd. All things told, I'm a pretty well adjusted adult. A bit of an introvert. But I spent most of my elem years resigning myself to a bad weird. I shouldn't have.

Poor, Matilda. My heart hurts for her and for you, JZ. I can still very much remember thinking I was as wonderful as my mother told me I was until I was in first grade and the girls I went to school with started telling me how different and not cool I was.

Happy thing of the day: [link]

Life is unfair. This is what Tuc Watkins looks like after 4 months of sleep-deprived single fatherhood to twins: [link]

Aw, fuzzy belly. Hey, Lee, how did you decided on Charlie's name?

I can still very much remember thinking I was as wonderful as my mother told me I was until I was in first grade and the girls I went to school with started telling me how different and not cool I was.

I remember Sophia having a similar story.

I talked to her in the bath. I told her how Emmett had sticky-outy ears as a baby and obviously he turned out just fine. And that (a) she looks fine; and (b) we don't always see ourselves the way other people see us; and (c) if she really wants curly hair like I______ she can get a perm. That you can choose how you want to look.

And I said, "You know what I notice about people? About the way they look? It's their style that makes them interesting. I said, "You know how Jilli dresses fancy?" And she nodded. I said, "That's one of the things that makes Jilli beautiful. Because her style is something she creates, that she makes for herself.

I talked about the things that we like in other people and it's not the way they look so much as whether they are kind and funny and interesting. But style is nice too.

Then I told Emmett that Matilda felt bad about her ears and I mentioned the story about his sticky-outy ears. And he picked her up and tipped her upside down and said, "What are you complaining about?! Your ears are perfect and lie flat to your head. I have ear problems! And I'm gorgeous! You're just making up a problem that's not real!"

Which made her laugh. Maybe because there was some tickling and she was upside down.

Hey, Lee, how did you decided on Charlie's name?

I needed one by sunday when we start obedience class, and Charlie seemed to be the best fit I came up with

My grandparents had a dog named Charlie and he was a great dog, so I am favorably disposed.

Isaac was in meltdown mode today too. Full on tantrum like I hadn't seen in ages. Maybe there's something in the air? Nah, I think in Isaac's case it's just a matter of overtired.

C just went to go see Yo La Tengo. I'd have liked to go with him, but more important that he get to see the show than he get to see it with me.

Franny had an interesting moment recently that's related to Matilda's meltdown. She has been doing that thing of being hard on herself, saying "I'm stupid" or "I can't" or, on this particular day, "I'm ugly." And I reminded her that she knew better than to talk about herself like that. So she whispered to me "I know I'm beautiful, mom, but I *feel like* I'm ugly."