I was always very peeved with Jesus about the fig tree. That tree wasn't doing anything wrong, if I remember right it wasn't even the season for figs to be producing yet.

canon jesus was a sassy middle eastern guy who literally said “did i fucking stutter” and hung out with prostitutes

DUDE! Where is the stutter comment?

That's been my mantra for the last four days.

Well, you probably don't have my visual, which is raising your guaard high enough that your cheekbones are covered, but with your body tucked enough that your ribs are safe--you're not trying for knockout--you just have to make it to the bell without getting knocked out yourself.

That's me till Christmas.

ChristianMingles.com is...not it's not them, it's their customer base. God could totally have hooked you up without a website. He helps those who help themselves, sure, but this is no divine tool, and he can use the supermarket checkout line if he so pleases.

Then again, Lifetime-class movies on a second tier rerun station, about Christmas and matchmaker dogs...I am getting what I deserve.

Think about Angry Jesus and the fig tree. It's very soothing.

I will. Also "did I fucking stutter?" (I don't know what the actual quote is they are referring to.)

she's in a much safer place. And my dad can get a break--he can leave the apartment and take the dog for a walk without feeling like he's putting her at risk.

Focus on that part, while getting through.

My life is such that ChristianMingle.com is the big joke between me and my mother.

Ugh, my day just went from enjoyable and very productive to "shoot me now!" Sometimes I hate parenting.

Is anyone else watching this Liz and Dick movie on Lifetime?

I'm not, but I'm seeing lots of FB comments and tweets about it. My fave so far...

Wait. This whole time I thought #LizAndDick was about the Cheneys. This changes everything.

Okay, so I got two adorable super-soft kitty kat dolls. In my insanity, I got them for the foster kids next door. I'm terrified to give them to them, for fear that I'll , ahem, foster a relationship that I don't want with them. I mean, if I could offer to babysit, I think I'm at the point of them breaking my heart that I would, but that isn't legally possible.

Do I give them the kitties?

Do I just hand them off the next time I see them? Knock on the door and give them to them under the eyes of their foster mother? Would this be more hurtful than helpful?

Wait, not real cats, right Juliebird? Just dolls? Is the foster mother not nice or something?

My throat hurts from all the yelling earlier today. And I'm tired. And I don't want to work tomorrow. But at least my weekend was mostly relaxing, unlike Suelas (it's getting better! It will be better! Yay for siblings?)

Why do you think it would be hurtful?

My life is such that ChristianMingle.com is the big joke between me and my mother.

I feel like JDate broached the consciousness around me before any explicitly Christian dating site (eharmony being implictly Christian, for the purpose of this assessment) but at about the same time as DateCatcher, which is...wait for it...the version of match.com specifically targeted towards Native Americans. And the logo is a heartshaped dreamcatcher (Jdate has a Magen David with one tip as a heart). And now I'm totally curious--Jdate says it's for meeting Jewish singles--does this exclude goyim looking for Jewish singles? And does Datecatcher have to deal with non-Native American people fetishising them? Bursting with curiosity here. There will always be people poaching.

Man...I need to learn to reread when I'm on dilaudid. I think I muff the post, get bored and hit Post message. Why the last step? Why? The first two make total sense, but I just can't stop myself from the third.