Gilbert Gottfried reading 50 Shades of Grey

DCP, I know! I was surprised. This wasn't insanely cheaper, but it did save some bucks.

Don't you get more security scrutiny with a one-way ticket? Maybe we're past that as a society, that would be nice.

This show is like a dark, dark, bittersweet chocolate dessert.

That's an excellent description!

Don't you get more security scrutiny with a one-way ticket?

No idea, didn't even think of that! If I get strip-searched, I'll live-tweet it.

As long as you have a plan.

The print issue was 48 days late because he kept adding articles, and we're still getting his copies to China in time for his conference. Wow. We rock, and nobody cares. I hate working in corporate America.

My niece K. got fired a couple weeks ago. Short version, the new Overlord didn't want anyone working remotely, so since she wouldn't *move to Arkansas*, her boss came up with all sorts of complaints, in a 2-week period, to get her terminated. This, after 8 months of high praise, and not one performance evaluation. Of course they can't do that, but they did. At first she was depressed, then she decided that since she hates working in that rigidly-structured bullshit-filled corporate environment anyway, she'd rather take a chance on being self-employed. Since then, she's gotten $4000 cash in hand for commissions. Today she showed up at my house with a vintage Dodge Aspen she just bought. She paid $400 and it's not exactly pristine, and she's in debt and she really shouldn't have done it, but fuck. I'm supposed to be the responsible adult here and counsel her to be careful and look for another job and blahblahlifeisscary, but fuck, if I had a skill and talent like she has (she's the painter/singer/costume designer) and connections like she has, I'd quit my damn job too.

Okay, I'm done. Back to work.

The last time I flew one-way, I breezed through security like usual, for one point of anecdata.

Outside cat made Loki lose his nut. They were actually attacking each other through the screen. Pumpkin FUHREAKED and then Outside Cat ran off and she and Loki decided they'd never seen each other before and I had to spend 10 mintes calming one, then the other, until their brains returned. Loki actually kinda talks when he's wailing in rage. It's a "mahRARmaLAR!" Kinda cool all the new consonants.

Pumpkin looks SERIOUSLY EVIL when she inflates. It's fucking amazing.

Now they are wandering around sniffling all the places they left their aggressive fear pheromones and growling at the spots.

Kayak.com is now showing me "Hacker" deals, where you book two one-way flights instead of one round-trip flight, to save money. That's pretty cool.

I'm still looking at F2F flights. I hear so much good about Alaska, but the flights out of Chicago say operated by American. So, no reason to pick that, right?

The print issue was 48 days late because he kept adding articles, and we're still getting his copies to China in time for his conference.

DAMN. We do totally have the same exact job.

(Except for that unnerving editing program you use.)