It is kind of a PITA to do and takes 3 hours, but it lasts a week!

Totally worth it for fanciness.

Happy birthday, Sumi!

One of the first uses of income that I don't need to put towards anything critical to my survival will be a good haircut.

Remember folks, you wear your hair, eyebrows and glasses every day so they're worthwhile fashion investments. Well, some of you might not wear your eyebrows every day. (Muppet!Angel, I'm looking at you.)

Thanks for the reminder, JenP--I just made a hair appointment for Friday.

In other news, my new boss (new since July) has a couple of times commented on my "bristly" personality.

Now, I don't think I'm bristly. I'm occasionally brusque with people I think are full of shit, but I do try to behave like a professional adult who doesn't fly off the handle. I'm friendly in the office without being all warm and fuzzy, and I have good reasons for expressing frustration from time to time (between My Nemesis and the farce that is the hiring process here). I would call my work style forthright but pleasant.

So my question is: how do I bring my boss around on this? I don't need hairpats or validation, but I would like some advice on redirecting him before review time. I suspect a part of the issue is that (a) I really only go to him when I have a problem, and (b) my biggest problem to date has been the issue with My Nemesis. Which leads me to think he's convinced himself this is a personality conflict and I'm just being too hard to please.

I have no intention of becoming The Complainer again--BTDT, got the t-shirt. It's an awful place to be. But I would love techniques for showing him how I'm not all bristly and trouble-making.

"Team-building" blows. Sounds like a pep rally from which you could get fired...what's to love? I've been hesitant about looking for big whys about my mental state since being a captive audience for some social worker's theory that maybe people with CP get other parts of our brains damaged. Maybe, but unless you consider how poor we have to stay, how hard it is for us to do stuff, and the damage that causes, babbling about some physical cause, like, "Eureka!" makes you a MORON. Also, I'm Irish and Scandinavian...we just, paint with the dark colors. I always look at those commercials for Abilify and wonder how psyched it's normal to be.

Consuela,

next time he says it (or before if you think this needs to be addressed right away), ask him for feedback about your demeanor. Mention to him you don't think you are bristly, but if that is how you are coming across, you'd like to change that.

Also ask the boss to reflect if you are "bristly" because you come to him with problems, and perhaps you should intentionally make time to speak with him on topics which aren't problematic.

I always look at those commercials for Abilify and wonder how psyched it's normal to be.

Man, totally. My "normal" is not going to be perky peppy cheerleader from hell (and I have a co-worker who is totally That Perky Peppy Cheerleader person), and medication *never* got me there. Because it isn't me. Meds made me functional, but never changed my personality, because that isn't what they're supposed to do.

If I'm ever perky and peppy, I probably need meds to stop the psychotic break.

Happy Birthdya, sumi!

((((Tom S.))))

I've become convinced that prescribing psych meds is an art, not a science. There are enough meds out there, and the reaction of any person to any particular med unpredictable enough, that it's about 1.5 steps above a guessing game.

Speaking of hair cuts, I know I need a new stylist, because with my hair now going curly (post-surgery), my old one has no idea how to cut it properly. I'm thinking about calling Mario Tricocci and seeing if I can get a consultation with one of their people. If she can give me some good ideas, I'll go back and have her cut it. It'll be pricey, but worth it to have it done properly for once.

I suspect a part of the issue is that (a) I really only go to him when I have a problem, and (b) my biggest problem to date has been the issue with My Nemesis. Which leads me to think he's convinced himself this is a personality conflict and I'm just being too hard to please.

You should make a point to talk to him about awesome stuff as well as Your Nemesis (etc.). And maybe more casually? Throw out something good at the copier or where ever you might bump into him? As opposed to only talking in Meetings.

I really recommend Sox's stylist. Sox has been rocking awfully perfect haircuts lately.

Oh, thanks -- I will make sure to ask her.

you wear your hair, eyebrows and glasses every day so they're worthwhile fashion investments

In discussion of vanity: I will admit that not being able to get my brows waxed as often as I'd have liked has been kind of crappy. And I would add nails to your list up there. I don't mean polish or whatever, but a good self or other administered manicure makes me feel more put together. [She says, looking at her crappy nails with chipped nail polish. Oops. And that is within my control, isn't it? (I'm not a very good brow plucker, though).]

ETA:

Thanks for the reminder, JenP--I just made a hair appointment for Friday.

Any time!

Speaking of hair cuts, I know I need a new stylist, because with my hair now going curly (post-surgery), my old one has no idea how to cut it properly.

This is pretty common. I recommend looking up Deva Curl salons in your area. They train the stylists to cut curly hair. They will cut it dry, with the curl, and teach you how to take care of it. Mine said to stop drying my hair with towels, to leave it sopping and blot it with paper towels. It's greatly reduced the amount of frizz. Stuff like that.