I also was intrigued by the author's conclusions on the current state of men and women in terms of education, accomplishment, life choices, etc. It was just interesting.

This was me.

I've made choices, consciously and not, that have led to me to where I am. And I'm not unhappy with the outcome. In fact, I fucking love where I've ended up thus far. I do think that I stopped mostly internalizing society's expectations in this regard rather early, so expecting couplage and kids is a distant memory, though I'm not entirely sure how that evolved.

I just noticed two baby (decorative) pumpkins on my tv. My mother must've done that. I keep finding little things dad fixed here and there. And random cash.

I keep finding little things dad fixed here and there. And random cash.

My parents used to do that. Once they visited with me and complained about my dining room chairs, and then months later I found several hundred dollars stashed inside a wristband designed to carry a key in during a workout (and that I never used)... Wacky.

that sounds like the tooth fairy to me.

the chair fairy?

Does anyone know where I can get the full text of the email that Obama sent when he announced his re-election campaign? And a link to the video of the announcement. We are doing a unit on political speech and watch Cain's announcement (shucky ducky!) today. Tomorrow will be Rick Perry then I'd like to do Obama for equal opportunity deconstruction.

I could just lower my standards. But why date someone I think isn't as awesome as I am?

I realize the conversation has moved on, but I just want to respond to this idea. I would NEVER tell someone to lower their standards, but what I would suggest in some cases is reevaluating them. Only because it made such a difference for me in my relationships. I had spent so many years looking for someone who, on paper, looked compatible with me. And I kept winding up with guys who just didn't want to commit.

So I asked myself what I really wanted, and the answers surprised me. I didn't really care how old someone was, how successful, what career or how much schooling, turned out I didn't even care much about whether I fell in love with a man or a woman. What I cared about was that committment. I wanted someone who wanted to be with ME, who wasn't still looking to see if someone better might come along. And then I met my DH. I could point to all sorts of superficial reasons why the relationship was a gamble, but none of that mattered because it was the first relationship I had ever been in that felt stable.

java, at least you've BEEN in long term relationships, even if you didn't get married in them! I sometimes suspect I should go to therapy just to determine if there is something bizarrely off about me that I have never dated someone more than about six months at a time...

In happier news, I am eating TJ's pumpkin cream cheese AIFG! NOM. I would not have picked it up were it not for Teppy's recommendation. I suspect I'm not meant to eat the whole tub in one sitting, though, which may be a problem.

An excellent point, Burrell.

And I'll add that sometimes people aren't waiting to see if someone "better" will come along; they just don't want to be with any one with any sort of permanent associations.

java, at least you've BEEN in long term relationships, even if you didn't get married in them! I sometimes suspect I should go to therapy just to determine if there is something bizarrely off about me that I have never dated someone more than about six months at a time...

Well I've had a weird past. Off and on for 15 years with one man (whom Aimee and MM have met - wait, maybe only MM met him) and then a long break, and then Steve (who many of you have met). Other than both being super smart/educated (although one in film and the other in science), they were SO different from each other. I was so happy that I didn't have a "pattern" of falling for the same type of person.

If I have any regrets, it's that I let myself be in love with W for so damned long. It didn't give me a chance to be available for anyone else. Until S.

meara, do you know what you want long-term?

that sounds like the tooth fairy to me.

the chair fairy?

Heh. I was thinking Easter Eggs (a la compute/game speak.)

They know I don't need the money. But they like to be the treat. I mean, Dad wouldn't let me pay for the vet bill for Pumpkin. Or the birthday dinner. I've learned from their example with their parents: object once, but accept if refused. Told them I wanted to treat them as a gift, but they said their treat was me. It makes them happier, I defer. They appreciate my genuine attempt, I appreciate their generosity.

Honestly, I think the best gift I give Dad is late night chats and letting him fix shit. Mom, the sotto voce mutterings about dad's quirks and honest confessions. Rest are just grace notes.

They enjoyed the BMA, Science Center, a visit with my cousin, tours of city neighborhoods, Evergreen House (oh, that was cool!) schlepping to pick up my computer, market, trip to my vet, met most of my beloved neighbors... Got a taste of my city and my life.

I love reading about your relationship with your parents, sara.