Maria, have someone call them and explain that the estate isn't settled. I'll do it for you if you want. They will wait. As will any other creditors.

They will wait. As will any other creditors.

Yes, they will.

And ... my memory is fuzzy, but IIRC there's a paperwork thing you can do with regard to creditors. Something about getting one document notarized with a public statement of date of death, and the creditors have "x" number of days to request being paid? I vaguely remember Dad mentioning this while dealing with the chaos of Mom's creditors we didn't know about.

Ah-ha: [link]

The most critical question in whether the living still bear responsibility for a dead person's debt is: Was the account individual, or shared? If a spouse, family member, or business partner signed the card application as a co-signer (joint account holder), then that person will be held liable for the balance on that card, along with (or instead of) the estate.

If that second cardholder is merely an authorized user (didn't sign the application, isn't liable for bills and merely has charging privileges), then he or she isn't responsible.

(And Maria, let me know if you don't want me to post this sort of info, and I'll stop. I'm just trying to find info for you, but I don't want to upset you.)

There is a thing. I didn't do it but my MiL did when FiL died, as advised by her lawyer, but I don't know what it's called.

{{{{{Maria}}}}}

And, yes, tell them to wait, or outsource the telling; there are so many people who want to do anything they can to help.

It helps. It hurts, but it helps.

Aims, I'm so glad you are off to a good start with your therapist. She sounds pretty great so far.

Ginger, I really hope that the blood test results are a whole lot of nothing.

Maria, I'm so sorry you are having to deal with this. So much. Please let me know if there's anything I can do. I'm really good at making calls. For real.

Oh, Maria. I wish I lived closer; I would totally come and be organizational bitch for you.

And if there's anything I can do long distance, just let me know. And you know you can always call and talk, yell and/or scream.

Maria,

but seriously. you can designate someone to take care of these financial matters for you so you don't have to bear the weight of it. have someone else open that kind of mail.

a lot of this stuff is bullshit under the best of circumstances. there are plenty of people here who would be happy to help and actually don't hate arguing with creditors/dealing with financial stuff.

Oh, Maria. I wish I lived closer; I would totally come and be organizational bitch for you.

I was just thinking the same thing. I've spent the last year at work sorting through drawers and bankers boxes full of papers nobody else could stand to sort through. If you and I both found cheap weekend tickets to Maria's, it would be AMAZING. A total organizational frenzy (yes, both organizational and frenzied, truly), followed by a ritual bonfire of everything in the to-be-shredded stack as we all drink chocolate martinis.