(my mom still frets over not challenging the cutoff date which gave me another year of nursery school, but I'm sure I will never ever hear apologies for the cruel things she said to me after I came out).
Ugggghhhhh.
[NAFDA] Spike-centric discussion. Lusty, lewd (only occasionally crude), risqué (and frisqué), bawdy (Oh, lawdy!), flirty ('cuz we're purty), raunchy talk inside. Caveat lector.
(my mom still frets over not challenging the cutoff date which gave me another year of nursery school, but I'm sure I will never ever hear apologies for the cruel things she said to me after I came out).
Ugggghhhhh.
It's like it was entirely about her -- she wanted to apologize on her terms, and we were just props for her scene.
That could honestly be what's going on. Are/were you having the weird mental dichotomy where part of you wants to say, well, here's a gold star for at least fucking *trying,* but the other part of you wants to go HOLY SHIT HOW DO YOU NOT SEE THIS?!?
That's so ridiculously frustrating. Does it help that at least your sister is in it with you, that she can validate that yes, you aren't crazy and your mother really DID do and say the things she claims to not remember?
Also: anyone have awesome present ideas for a guy who is old, blind in one eye, deaf in one ear, and doesn't like to leave his recliner much? Aka, my dad?
A one-piece earphone head-set thingy (surely they make good ones?) and some music he really likes on an iPod? Something from his teens maybe?
Hmm. He's never been much of a drinker, and apparently the antibiotics he's on for the eye thing are killing his appetite. But I may go find some monk-baked fruitcake or something. Adopt a nun again. Anyone have good Catholic-related charitable giving?
Weed? Kidding. Mostly. If he'd like something charitable that's sort of personal there are various parishes that got whapped by Sandy and are having fund-raisers. They surely have prayers and whatnot too, maybe he'd get into helping them spiritually as well. And maybe you'd be ok with something recovery-related as opposed to generally religious. [link] [link]
Hil, it does sound like your Mom was doing this just for herself.
Yeah, she had this big hug&grow&learn&cry bond-o-rama planned and you went and made it about actual stuff.
I kind of want to go to bed right now, I'm wiped out. It's not even 8:30.
So I started my day with an epiphany that I needed to move on my beer consulting (or whatever) dream in 2013 and got all riled up about it, and had a good productive therapy session (in which that was discussed) and then the news that we closed on the damn house... I was flying high, and now I am CRASHED.
I hope I can get a decent marketable idea to get some traction on this beer consultant dream.
cereal to add that Tom has been running around all evening picking stuff up and organizing stuff, which makes me feel even more tired.
cereal to add that Tom has been running around all evening picking stuff up and organizing stuff, which makes me feel even more tired.
"It's not like that makes up for his blatant vanity-casting" is where my tired brain went first.
If he'd like something charitable that's sort of personal there are various parishes that got whapped by Sandy and are having fund-raisers. They surely have prayers and whatnot too, maybe he'd get into helping them spiritually as well.
Ooh, that's great, thanks Trudy!!
My siblings and I have often gone in on gifts together, so I'll check with my sister, but she's been buying him tickets to a baseball or basketball game, the past couple years, to go with him. But since I wouldn't be able to go with it's not quite the same...
That's so ridiculously frustrating. Does it help that at least your sister is in it with you, that she can validate that yes, you aren't crazy and your mother really DID do and say the things she claims to not remember?
Absolutely.
Yeah, she had this big hug&grow&learn&cry bond-o-rama planned and you went and made it about actual stuff.
Yeah. She was the only one crying.
Oh, and when we were teenagers, sometimes, after she'd say something about what we were eating or how much we weighed, one of us would say, "Mom, stop it. You're going to make us anorexic." She'd reply, "No, people in this family like food too much to ever be anorexic. Bulimic, maybe." She still thinks this is funny.
She still thinks this is funny.
::facepalm::
Nora, that is exciting! I would love to hear more and maybe help you brainstorm and stuff.