More ME stuff! Family crisis drama update! After a lovely weekend away, I came back to a phone call from my sister that quickly went back to the Drama, which rather harshed my mellow. Seems the girl apologized to her mom (but not to me, of course) so they're all fine now. My sister is concerned about having cosigned such a large loan, but I didn't feel like reassuring her. I said I was basically done, that I'd give her anything she asked me for (emphasis on asking; I'll no longer volunteer anything including words) except money, but I wouldn't try to "mediate" or be a buffer between them anymore, and don't ask me to take her to lunch and try to sneak some good advice into the conversation anymore, either. My sister wasn't happy with that, but seemed to accept it. Ten minutes later she called back to talk about it some more, and I lost it. My version of "losing it" does not involve screaming, throwing things, or heaping abuse upon people who love me, which I guess means I must be adopted. For me, losing it means crying and telling the truth. I told her I meant it, that I'd been abused enough in my life and no one is going to treat me like that again, not even my emotionally fragile niece. I actually got my sister to hush and listen to me, which I believe has only happened once before in my life. Today she texted me with "Sorry about last night but glad you told me," so I think my ultimatum, such as it was, is accepted. In short, I really am done with dealing with my niece. I'll be friendly at family gatherings and not see her otherwise, and I truly don't think she'll even notice that I've withdrawn from her life.
(Standard disclaimer: my sister is a wonderful person and I love her a lot. She just has Issues regarding these, um, issues.)