Think about it from the POV of wanting to find out what these cool nerd women are like. Someone whose attitude is "I want to get to know you, Other Interesting Person," is WAY more appealing than "I want you to find me attractive!"

Tep has ALL the wise.

Having a goal like this reduces so much stress and can actually make the vent fun...which is a goal that often gets lost in the 'I have to be accepted/wanted/omgdon'tletmebedisfavorablyjudged' frenzy.

I like to enter into such things with as much cheerfulness as is available and, should things go wrong, remind myself..."In a hundred years, all new people." No songs or laments will immortalize my ignominy.

I applaud and support Scrappy's tonsorial recommendation.

P-C, for the first 26 years of my life, I parted my hair down the middle. I even actively dug into the 'crease' with a sharp comb to make sure the part stayed straight because 'I would never want anything else.'

Then, I got a radically different hairstyle for practical reasons. Hip-length hair would not have suffered living outside for 9 months well.

I think the less-blunt shape Scrappy linked would frame those gorgeous eyes of yours beautifully.

Is it wrong that my insidious thought in writing that was that changing from the style your parents gave you would be a terrific step in your burgeoning personhood? Okay, maybe it is a reach, but it DID cross mind.

On the other hand, I might have panicked if anyone suggested I cut off my flowing locks until I chose to do so. So, take it with a boulder of salt.

No songs or laments will immortalize my ignominy.

At least, one hopes not. Hopefully there will be no budding musicians/writers who go "Wow, I'm inspired by that one person! I shall write my magnum opus about their ignominy!"

In other words, do well in your interpersonal mingling!

You ever have those nights that you are totally in the mood to be doing everything you're doing? That is happening to me right now AIFG!

Relatedly, although New Orleans drives me insane all the time I love it more than I can even say. At this point I cannot even conceive of living elsewhere.

Also, I fucking love Elvis Costello (am listening to Girls Girls Girls right now).

Anyway, I feel like I bitch and complain all the time, so I figure I should share the ups as well as the downs. I also may or may not be pleasantly buzzed.

Yes, everybody should share their pleasant buzz.

I'm glad you and Tom moved to NOLA, Nora.

You ever have those nights that you are totally in the mood to be doing everything you're doing? That is happening to me right now AIFG!

Whee! Glad to hear it.

Somehow I missed the hair discussion. I also agree that the cut Scrappy linked would look good.

Sooo, back from date. He brought me a pretty scarf from China! It's green and has embroidered flowers. He said he didn't know what color to get me... and then he gave his friend an orange one, which is her favorite color, which she didn't know he knew. I think he may have remembered that I wore a green shirt on our first date and that's why he got me green.

I like his friends - the hosts have a hilarious five year old, and made some excellent food, and there was also a lesbian couple there who were super nice. Nora, I drank TWO beers. Two. Lazy Magnolia Indian Summer, because I know you're going to ask. I picked it out my very own self.

We did end up going to see Batman. It was very long and very loud. He liked it quite a lot - I am feeling conflicted. Came back to my place for a little light making out, and then he left to meet friends who've come into town. Trying to just take things as they come. Feelings are super jumbled. Probably seeing him again tomorrow night.

Doesn't sound bad at all, smonster! A light, thoughtful pretty gift, he took you to meet his friends, you made out (was he any good, any chemistry?)

Batman's a dark movie. But he has some geekly tendencies, so there's that.

Let's see what happens tomorrow night.

P-C, you have gotten excellent advice. If I were a girl, say ME, going to one of these things, I'd be looking for a guy who would look like he took decent care of himself *You do, you're a good-looking guy, but I approve the new hair style).

You have good clothes; a pair of well fitting jeans or pants, nothing too formal, you feel confident in. One of your favorite geeky t-shirts, You have nice classes.

I'd be looking for someone who had a smile, maybe a little nervous, because I'd be nervous too. But someone who would initiate or respond to "Hey, cool-----! I love Blah."

And then just be your regular, funny, courteous self. Just go into it "Hey, I am going to go play some games with some geeks, and some will be cute geek girls and that will be neat. I will have fun and try to make new friends, and maybe I will feel a connection with someone and we might check it out. But I will mainly go to have fun and talk geek and look at cute girls and talk to some people who like some of the same things I like."

Hey, all! Glad of the good date for smonster. Wishing a good time to P-C. Dude, you've gotten some terrific advice, so I'm just going to reiterate: be yourself, be interested in the other people, and have fun!

So, I've been doing a bit of online dating myself this summer. Several first dates, not so much any second, but the fact that I'm doing some dating after years of not? I am very proud of myself for getting out there. Mostly, I'm meeting men on Match.

Anyway, I say all this to explain this dude I've been emailing. I am so amused by the whole thing I can barely stand it. He's supposedly half French/half Australian, relocated to Chicago a month ago, didn't even get a chance to get an apartment and had to leave for London for business.

I really believe the dude is looking for a green card wife. I don't believe anything he's saying, but I continue to email him just for the amusement factor. I want to see how far he'll take this. Just got an email from him tonight declaring his undying love for me. Now, I've never met him, never talked on the phone with him, never even IM'd with him. We've just emailed. For about 3 weeks. I have a bet with some of my friends that he'll propose via email.

Frankly, I am totally amused by the whole situation. Does he really think this will work with someone?

Oh, man, ChiKat. Be careful? He doesn't know anything about you, right?

Yes, there was chemistry. There's potential there, I think.

Man, I am tired. And slightly hungover on two beers - I think I was a little dehydrated to start with? Didn't sleep super well.

Lesson learned today (although, certainly aware of it prior to today): Curtains, just because no neighbor can see into your bedroom, doesn't mean you don't need curtains. They do a great job at keeping light out of your bedroom, so when you stay up until 4am unpacking stuff, and rearranging things, you can sleep in late.

ChiKat,

OMG. In my previous experience, some men come on strong like that via online dating because a) they think this is the best way to get a woman to sleep with them upon meeting; b) they are actually 17 years old and are playing with you; or c) they have really poor social graces.

It might be a combination of all 3!

I'm glad you are amused. Please let us know if there is an email proposal.