Still sending positive vibes smonster-ward and hugging Nora for being such a good friend.

Hiya, (west coast US) night shift. I am WIDE a-friggin' awake despite knowing my alarm is going to go off in less than six hours. Hello, work stress brain! Blah. Middle management can be a bitch. At the moment I'm stressing about one of my department members who may or may not be leaving for a new job but has been half-assedly trying to hide it from me for no apparent reason. I mean, I get why he's looking, but why the secrecy? I thought at first he was trying to avoid admin knowing, but apparently he talked to my boss already--he just decided to skip me and leave me in the dark, which is especially galling considering I've gone out of my way for him--including writing him a rec for a summer program with less than 24 hours notice a couple of months ago. Oh, and he was one of my formal evals this year--I've literally spent hours upon hours working with him and am about to start, in theory, writing the massive summative report for his professional growth, and I'll be damned if I'm going to bother if the guy isn't coming back and hasn't bothered to tell me to my face.

There's more, but this is not helping me calm down in order to fall asleep.

Pix, I think you answered your own question, chica. He probably feels the weight of all that you've done (and are doing) for him and feels incredibly awkward about leaving you. Maybe?

That would be so nice if it were true, and maybe that's a piece of it. I hope so. We've also had some disagreemets this year, mostly due to how touchy he can be about minor events, so I think it may also be that he is very conflict avoidant and thought it would be easier to pretend or deny rather than just tell me.

Honestly, it bums me out. I like to think that I'm fair and approachable, and it makes me sad to think he doesn't feel safe enough to just tell me the truth. You know how it is, Java, as someone who's been a boss (though much higher up the food chain than I am).

I also just don't like unnecessary secrets, and he in the past has accused me/the school of being too secretive. Ah, irony.

Oh, that is ironic, yuck. You're just as high in any food chain as I ever was!

I bet he's totally conflict-avoidy. And from the sound of it, even though it's bumming you out understandably, maybe he's an energy creature that you just don't need around.

You're one of the most approachable and fair human beings that I've ever met, and also one of the most giving. I think this is on him. And I know I am biased, but I am also not prone to saying stuff like this if I don't mean it.

You're awesome. I really needed to hear that, sweetie. Thanks.

And he is actually a massive energy creature, though also a very good teacher. At this point I truly do hope he gets another job -- in part because he will be happier, but also because I will be.

Should be in bed, but... well. Not. I managed to not do anything on the to-do list. Blargh.

Pix, get some sleep, would ya! (ha, like I'm any better)

Nora/Smonster? How goes it down there? Anyone else picturing them, sleeping on each others shoulders in the waiting room? Aw, they are so cute. (ok, so I need to get out more, so sue me)

And by that, I mean, I hope it's all going well, and that the docs are taking care of you.

Brackets, Pix.

Home. Nothing immediately life-threatening, interim diagnosis of lymphangitis (blood poisoning). Course of ABs and Percocet as needed. Follow-up with PCP.

Fall down go boom now. I kept trying to get Nora to leave, she wouldn't go home. Nice lady, that Nora.

Nora is awesome. But we dont like our peoples blood poisoned.

Glad you have abs and good drugs.

Yay Nora! Boo, blood poisoning. I hope the ABs clear it up quickly.

blood poisoning?!

but not life-threatening?!

do not understand. do not like.