Something wacky in the air? I've been feeling low-level general anxiety half of yesterday, most of today. I think the main reason it is gone now is sheer exhaustion. Tough day at work.

Watching someone suffer through dimentia and very painful arthritis and attempting to assist that person through the day is one of the toughest parts of my job - both physically and emotionally.

I am taking my own advice WRT to Gatorade and some ibuprofen, too, because I have a headache and I can't tell if it's dehydration or muscle tightness from carrying my umbrella in my right hand all day (I have poor proprioception and don't realize when I'm hunching my shoulder).

And now shower and bed. Goodnight, my darlings - thank you as always for your love and support and making me laugh and sharing the good and the bad.

eta x-post with WindSparrow - that must be so, so exhausting. I can't even imagine. Blessings on your head.

Sean, I don't know what to say. So much of what people said to me when I was suffering from loneliness sounded like such utter crap that I resented them for it, and then felt guilty for resenting people who were trying to help.

You know what would be awesome? If we could curse Cancer (the disease, the entity) with Loneliness - or give Loneliness a tumor. If Cancer and Loneliness were busy fighting each other, they would stop plaguing people.

I never feel completely lonely as long as I can talk to the invisible people. I'd be much more lonely without all of you.

I hope this turns out to be a much better year for you, Sean.

Yup, this, Ginger.

Although, Sean, I know it can be so isolating. Loneliness is hard.

I was having such a good day, with really good friends, then BAM! I got home, and it was like a punch in the face.

HI Sean!

Good luck sans St. Woot, smonster!

I had a pretty good day--got up at a decent hour, got some breakfast, sewed a couple of little zippered pouches (one for me, with a red-with-blue-anchors-and-white rope patterned fabric, one for the roomie with pink and brown and polka dots and a cupcake patch on the back). And then we went to the running store and I bought new things for my shoes (to hopefully keep my shin splints under control), and then to Ben and Jerry's. And then walked a bit, took some pictures of her for a contest, got some sushi, came home and sewed her a tote bag (I'd bought her fabric that had runners and "you go girl" and stuff printed on it). And now I'm watching SYTYCD!

I'm feeling a little better now, but it is kind of an all-the-time thing.

I wish the black dog would stop harassing you, as i'm sure you do too.

Loneliness...ach, it is gutting. You can feel lonely in the middle of a crowded room. And booze is a depressant; you can switch from euphoria to bone-deep sadness at the flip of a switch.

You may feel lonely and sad, my dear Sean, but you are not alone.

And yes, I broke my arm, on the only occasion D is away from me for 6 days. I feel lonely, too, but talking to y'all is keeping me from losing my doogies.

I (this is a secret) want desperately to feel cosseted and loved right now, but I am DAMNED if I will let D know this, and I need to be strong and together for my dad, mom & sister now. So. I am here with my arm alone until Thursday, channeling stoicism.

So if you need to talk, Sean, you are NOT alone and I am here, should you need an ear. Feel free to e-me and get my cell number; I am quite a damned good listener...and I get it.

Much love your way.