Oh, Cass. I am so sorry. I really do understand. I don't cry for Mickey every day anymore (so I know I'm getting more used to him being gone...I'll never be "over it"), but I still cry regularly. Cried for him on the way home from work.
Add the stress and worry about your dad? And it truly sucks. My dad's not well. He's been slowly declining for several years and I think he's slipping into the final stages. Because of his declining health, I have very complicated feelings about this.
To sum up, I'm sorry, love. I wish I could make things better for you.
To sum up, I'm sorry, love. I wish I could make things better for you.
I wish you could too.
Dad has an ocology appt soon where we find out treatment options and then it's a question of his strength both mentally or physically.
Talking to him last night when he asked how my cat was doing was brutal. Because she's gone and either no one told him or he forgot. Probably no one told him. It hurts him to hear his little girl crying because she's lost too much.
Oh Cass, what a conversation to have to have.
Worrying about your parents' health is such a hard space. It's such a reversal of the order of things, and I don't think there's any way to prepare for it. And it truly sucks having to be strong for them. And yet.
I'm sorry.
Oh Cass I wish there was something I could do.
Cass, much comfort to you. I'm so sorry for your loss and struggles.
I'm so sorry, Cass. I hate the thought of you sliding down the wall to cry without someone there to put their arms around you. Mine are reaching; they're just painfully too short to cross a state line.
Anything you can do to be kind and gentle to yourself, even if it's as small as cookies and milk or a shameless cry in a hot shower, anything at all, do it. I wish you were surrounded by Buffistas right now.
JZ is great with words. I nod, and point. And add my brackets. {{{ Cass }}} As someone who is dealing with father fighting Cancer, we are siblings in this war. To which I say, Fuck Cancer, because it can't be said enough.
Oh, Cass. I'm so sorry, my love. So, so sorry.
Steph, good to hear that your brother is improving! Keeping him and his wife and you in my thoughts.
~~~~~
My evening has been ridic. Shower won't drain, took cold sit-down shower at landlady's, gave in and ordered pizza. I'm sitting in the living room eating it, because my kitchen is stupid warm, and (whitefont for bugs not Jillifont)
fucking termites are divebombing my legs and computer.
Two weeks ago it was
termite swarm season
in my kitchen and apparently now it's that season in my living room. WTF.
Honestly, I'm too tired to be cranky, and I still have work to do tonight, so I'm hovering somewhere around bemused, almost but not quite amused.
I'm sorry, Cass. It's so hard having it all pile on top of one another.
Loyal auxilary backup froggie, taking one for the team.
It is loyal indeed, especially since it used to be of equal standing with the other froggie until our little boy started playing favourites. Of the four of us, auxiliary backup froggie was easily the most stoic at getting covered in vomit (or as Ryan calls it, "gluggy gluggy").
Ryan's much better today. Cheerful chappie off to childcare. We saw a rainbow in the sky when we got there, for some extra cheer.
