I do remember hearing something about corncobs and the Pilgrims ...
Good luck. Try not to kill people. Hands! Hands!
Willow ,'Storyteller'
Natter 68: Bork Bork Bork
Off-topic discussion. Wanna talk about corsets, duct tape, or physics? This is the place. Detailed discussion of any current-season TV must be whitefonted.
Amy - May 19, 2011 6:46:47 am PDT #8792 of 30001
Because books.
tommyrot - May 19, 2011 6:48:27 am PDT #8793 of 30001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
Okay, whose ass can use shards?
Maybe you'd use the meat of the coconut? And then the milk to wash up? I dunno.
Dammit, this is going to be bugging me all day now.
I know. You'd find someone else and say, "I'll give you this coconut if you wipe my ass for me."
Matt the Bruins fan - May 19, 2011 6:48:39 am PDT #8794 of 30001
"I remember when they eventually introduced that drug kingpin who murdered people and smuggled drugs inside snakes and I was like 'Finally. A normal person.'” —RahvinDragand
I've always thought personal hygiene issues like that would be a way bigger barrier to enjoying life in some romanticized former era than missing things like the internet or modern transportation.
tommyrot - May 19, 2011 6:49:43 am PDT #8795 of 30001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
I do remember hearing something about corncobs and the Pilgrims ...
When I was about four or five, I found a novelty "corncob with an electrical cord" in the bathroom of a relative's house. It freaked me out.
§ ita § - May 19, 2011 6:54:08 am PDT #8796 of 30001
Well not canonically, no, but this is transformative fiction.
I found a novelty "corncob with an electrical cord" in the bathroom of a relative's house. It freaked me out
My mind is supposed to go where my mind is going, right? Right?
Ginger - May 19, 2011 6:55:03 am PDT #8797 of 30001
"It didn't taste good. It tasted soooo horrible. It tasted like....a vodka martini." - Matilda
My mother, who grew up before Kleenex, pads and tampons, views paper products as the greatest inventions of the century.
Sparky1 - May 19, 2011 6:57:24 am PDT #8798 of 30001
Librarian Warlord
From Wait Wait Don't Tell Me:
SAGAL: For your last innovation, please listen to this advertisement from 1935, read for you by Carl.
KASELL: Guaranteed 100 percent free from splinters.
SAGAL: What product was finally offered squeezably soft and splinter-free?
Ms. DAVIDSON: A hint?
(Soundbite of laughter)
Ms. DAVIDSON: Please.
SAGAL: Mr. Whipple got splinters in his fingers.
Mr. ROCCA: Oh my god, wait, oh my gosh.
Ms. DAVIDSON: Oh, it's the sponge. No, wait.
(Soundbite of laughter)
Ms. DAVIDSON: Oh, toilet paper.
SAGAL: Toilet paper, yes, of course, toilet paper.
(Soundbite of bell)
Ms. DAVIDSON: Oh, what else.
Mr. BODETT: It took until 1935?
SAGAL: Amazingly.
Mr. ROCCA: Geez, what my grandparents went through.
SAGAL: Yeah, exactly. The next time some television commenter starts telling you that things are just as bad now as the Great Depression, don't you believe it.
tommyrot - May 19, 2011 6:58:19 am PDT #8799 of 30001
Sir, it's not an offence to let your cat eat your bacon. Okay? And we don't arrest cats, I'm very sorry.
My mind is supposed to go where my mind is going, right? Right?
Yeah. Unless your mind went to "vibrator," because it wasn't one.
The electrical cord didn't actually do anything. I forget what it was called, but I think "Hillbilly" was somewhere in the name of the thing (it was still in its box).
Jessica - May 19, 2011 7:01:10 am PDT #8800 of 30001
And then Ortus came and said "It's Ortin' time" and they all Orted off into the sunset
Coconut husk fibers, maybe? Still pretty scratchy, but better than a whole coconut.
Amy - May 19, 2011 7:02:09 am PDT #8801 of 30001
Because books.
I want to go hug the Charmin bears.