One of the National Zoo's clouded leopards used to occasionally demonstrate her relationship to domestic cats. She'd get out of her cage ... and then find a nice sunny spot just outside and lie in the sun. Didn't run away, didn't go for a long walk. She just wanted OUT (because she was IN).

Her name? Moot.

It's been pouring rain here pretty much all day. Looks like it's supposed to turn to snow by Thursday.

I completely shocked my officemate, who is from Texas, by telling him that there will probably be several months of below-freezing temperatures.

P-C, I've been catching up, and I hear echoes of my family situation in what you've been posting.

I tried to be perfect, in the hope that someday I'd be good enough for my parents. I was an A student, never any discipline problems at school, did a lot of housework from an early age. But it was never enough. And every imperfection was taken as a sign that I was evil, that I was crazy, that I was willfully being difficult to make my parents unhappy. I tried to essentially erase the person I was and substitute a person they could accept. And it still wasn't enough. When I was in my teens, people would compliment my mother on me - my good grades, my manners, the fact that I dressed modestly ... and she'd go into a litany of how much of a problem I was. She'd tell me to be more like my sister, who was sweet and pretty and socially adept. (I suspect my sister was told to be more like me - get better grades, do more housework, etc.) I finally gave up, moved away, tried to make my own life. Whenever I was with my mother (my father died when I was 25), she'd insist I wasn't actually like this, that I was just being contrary. I finally figured out that she'd constructed her ideal daughter, and pasted that image on whichever of us wasn't there. She loved her image, but couldn't stand the real person. And I kept wanting to please her, until I realized that I would never be able to please her and that she was never going to accept the person I really am.

So ... I've cut off contact. I call on birthdays, mother's day, and such, but not to just talk. This started right after Christmas last year ... since then, I've gotten one call, a brief one, to let me know that my mother was in the hospital again. They've sent birthday cards, the snide halloween card ... but that's it. I'm staying home for Christmas this year, even if they invite me up, and I expect it'll be a lot less painful than Christmases past.

OMG caught up. Whew.

Exhausting day. Dug out an old foundation. Going to bed early, for sure.

Watching Passion. It was this or Forever, and I couldn't handle that tonight.

Yay, beth! Congratulations!!!

Congrats, beth!!

Congrats, beth!!

It's wonderful seeing so many people getting jobs.

edit: particularly jobs they really want.

Congrats, beth!

Congratulations, Beth!