Oh, smonster. Poor itchy you.

Hil, I'm glad you got the meds you need. Sending a little anti-bronchitis~ma.

There may have been more. I really can't manage more than one thing at a time.

Thank you for the birthday wishes, everyone!

Happy birthday, Jilli!

Happy birthday Jilli!

Hil, I hope you feel better soon. Bronchitis sounds horrid.

Please to have coping~ma for my meeting today. In The Girl's words, it's with "the bitch from the research office and the useless idiot from disability services." And the scary woman in charge of my supervisor who ignored my complaint for a week and had meetings about me behind my back. I'm going to be awesome at this meeting, yes I am. Gulp.

Go, Seska!

I am one of the people in the world that is horrible about making phone calls, or sending emails , etc. so i was thinking about what bonny was going through. and than I did reach a conclusion about me - I am pretty good about admitting that i screwed up . And the biggest help in changing some of this behavior is Matt. If I am on the fence about something, I'll ask him and he encourages me to do the right thing.

Which makes me think about the other thing. The relationship contract I have with Matt is very flexible, by design. Of course, long ago in the dark ages before we were married - we did break up briefly. which did lead to a lot of reassessment on our parts. I am sure there are other ways to do that but, it lead to a lot more flexibility in our relationship. Which is good to remember when I get agitated

I'm really sorry I missed the friendship discussion, but it was fascinating catching up. I will say that in my second-longest relationship, marriage, we are forced to renegotiate at fairly frequent intervals. Neither of us is the same person we were when we got married. Some of our changes happened in synch, and at one point one of us would surge ahead in knowledge or experience, and wind up looking at the laggart going, who are you now? And what are you doing in my life, again? Sometimes our experiences would lead us on paths that diverged, like, whoa, diverging for a long, scary time, and then the paths would draw close again like magnets and it would be all, oh hi! I know you! I really like you a lot! No, really really a lot, hi! And sometimes we just go along together with a common goal or a common burden, and need to be close enough for mutual leaning.

But the bedrock of it all is pretty constant communication and awareness. Hey! You're all take-care-of-paperwork guy! How did this insurance payment slip by you? Or I thought you were handling all the touchy-feely anniversary, birthday, and we're happy you're in the world cards and gifties on both sides of the family, so how come my mom's all hurt because we forgot her birthday? The relationship changes, and that constitution Hec mentioned has to be renegotiated.

Bonny, even though you've thought your way through your decision (and I happen to agree with you), I did want to reemphasize what someone said in a slightly different way. When you hammer out the dynamics in the early part of a relationship, each of you accepts certain things about the other, and that image of the other is static, unless something is done to change it--and the other person in the relationship is willing to accept a change.

Evidently your friend's image of you has a description set in stone. You have changed--grown, matured, adapted, developed--and she apparently has not. She expects you to provide those elements in the relationship you have before, and she doesn't sound willing to accept a new description of who you want to be to her, nor the elements in the relationship you want her to provide.

This is an impasse, and the onus is on her to change, because the truth is, you've already moved on. Leaving her behind hurts a little, but far less than dragging her along behind you like a sea anchor.

I'm sorry. But also, congratulations.

Drew, I'm sorry for your loss.

smonster, do you have time to check with a doctor? Possibly a derm guy? It sounds like you need to pin this down so it stops recurring.

Barb, all I can offer is Hicks in Aliens, "Ease down! You've blown the transaxle. Ease down!" Or, possibly Terrance Mann in A Chorus Line, "You're doing fine. Bring it down a little."

So much health-ma, job-ma, happy-ma and general well-being wished to all mah bitches. I hate slinking in late and out again, but one does as one can. Mwah!

Much Seska-is-awesomely-persuasive~ma going across the Pond.

Beverly, it is always good to see your font here.

For people needing a little chuckle: [link] I bring you a link to a video of a Persian cat playing with a young ferret, posted on YouTube by an online-acquaintance of mine.

Speaking of cats, How to relax like a cat

Cats can teach us many things.