Hec, I think you're right about the "relationship Constitution". People tend to establish a dynamic real early on, and it's almost impossible to change it, especially if one party thinks the way things are is just fine.
bonny, I"m glad you found the discussion useful.
I read a book when I was a teenager called The Dance of Anger that was probably the first time I was able to see the people in my life and our relationships objectively. Interpersonal dynamics seemed almost like tidal forces, forces of nature, and I realized you (the general you) can't change the other person, and you can't always change yourself, but you can change the dynamic - if you change the way you act/react in the dynamic, the dynamic HAS to change around you. You become like the rock in the stream. It may not change the way you want it to, but if it has to change, you can change it - even if only by leaving it.
And now I realize that I was smarter when I was a kid than I was in my twenties and thirties. Maybe it was the hormones.
I'm going to blame my confusion on the remnants of a migraine that I've got... It made you think of me b/c I'm so notoriously not a morning person?
Codeine cough syrup is making me nicely mellow. And not coughing as much. Still coughing some, but it's calmed down a lot.
smonster, I'm totally behind on everything, but I'm catching up! I'll call you in the morning.
Happy birthday, Jilli!
I hope you feel better soon, Hil.
Zen! Don't call me! I'm off to New Orleans until Tuesday and don't need to get up that early. Heh.
OMG and happy birthday to Jilli!
It made you think of me b/c I'm so notoriously not a morning person?
Well, yes, and that Zen calls you to get you up. But in a cheerful way, one presumes.
We are both polite and affable, but neither of us is much up for cheerfulness at that hour.
Just making sure I wasn't missing something. Cannot brane, have teh migraine stupid.
Zen! Don't call me! I'm off to New Orleans until Tuesday and don't need to get up that early. Heh.
Oh, right! Okay, no early-morning announcements of what day it is.
But in a cheerful way, one presumes.
We're cheerful. Yeah.