Spidra, may your parents get a clue real soon.

The pretty little black-and-white feral cat that likes to hang out on my patio is deliberately driving Leo batshit. Stray's on the porch, up on the bench, so he can put his paws on the front window. Leo's running back and forth on the windowsill hissing. I'd think that cat was flirting with him, the way he rolls around on the patio when Leo's watching, but I'm pretty sure I've seen little black-and-white balls on him. It's hard to tell for sure, though.

Little stray cat has been sitting outside staring in the window for an hour. I'm gonna name him Tiny Tim.

Don't do it! Once you give him a name, there is no getting rid of him!

(wow, I was channeling mom there. Spooky)

Too late! Little Timmy went away for a little while, and now he's back, staring in the window at me and Leo. Okay, little dude, now it's getting weird. Leo is not coming to play with you now; he's sleeping, so he's no longer interested in fiercely defending his territory. Sorry.

he's huuuunnnngryyyyyy! Feeeeed hiiiimmmmm!

Why do you think he hangs out here?!

There are rules for this sort of thing.

Maybe you should call him Eddie Haskel.

There are rules for this sort of thing.

Ha! Yeah, I feed them, because I'm a big softie, and I love watching them! But coming inside, no. Even if they tried to, which they don't. I wouldn't bring any cat inside with my housecats unless they were checked out by a vet and deemed healthy. Which isn't gonna happen, because I can't catch them. These cats are almost certainly feral, not stray. They've gotten accustomed to me as the Bringer of Food and Water, so they'll hide under the bushes and watch me, but they won't let me get near them. They're smart enough to stay away from humans.

One of them isn't named Dark, is she?