Teppy, I had to read your FB post twice last night to make sure you weren't saying you'd gotten engaged.

Ahahaha! Man, I gotta be better at the clarity thing!

(For the record, should I get engaged, any announcement of same will NOT be tucked in the middle of a FB post.)

One thing I've learned from lurking in various communities and blogs, and from personal experience, is that constantly being an educator is exhausting. Especially when it's something personal that is frequently dismissed, belittled, or perceived as made-up. And when one has multiple aspects that require endless education, well, it gets exponentially more exhausting.

By which I mean to validate your frustration, Seska, and the reluctance/weariness that you feel about explaining *yet again* your need for accomodation. It's easy to wonder if the movement wants you (general you), and to conclude that your mental health and self-respect take precedence.

Thanks, Cashmere. If she were paying me I could see trying to be a control freak about it, but it is a gift so I wish she would back off a bit. She doesn't want one for the mens room at all so I'm glad I didn't already buy the top hat.

Thanks, smonster. It is exhausting, but it's also what I do. So on the one hand, I get hugely frustrated, but on the other hand I spend a lot of time delivering training around accessibility and inclusion. But it's one thing to advise on policy and practice around access and inclusion, and quite another to stand up for yourself.

I hadn't even thought of putting baskets in the restrooms (/bad bride)

I hadn't even thought of putting baskets in the restrooms

People do that? I doubt I'll have time to check there's paper in there...

Not everyone does it, but it usually has safety pins, clear nailpolish, hand lotion, etc that guests might need. I enjoy making them and I am good at it, which is not something I can say about many things so when the bride say don't do this or that because it is silly or stupid, I get hurt

I can't tell you how happy I always am to see those baskets at an event. Dress hem torn? Safety pin! Run in pantyhose? Clear nail polish! Stuff I don't always have in my purse is welcome and a sweet idea.

Teppy, that is hysterical about the engagement post. Something similar happened to me recently where people thought I was already married.

So far today I have had bloodwork that did not go well, now I am getting new leg braces, and next x-rays. Can it be bedtime now?

Yeah, there are a lot of times where I don't take on the educator role like I used to.I'm just not interested in being people's entree into the Crip Experience...I don't know how it is in other countries, Seska, but here I feel like to be a good disability activist, I had to give up a lot of my individuality. Some of those people I did movement things with had nothing else in their lives. Ever.(I mean, in a way, I understand, cause they keep us so poor and stuff, but I do need to talk about other things from time to time.)