Ran into this entry for the Bulwar-Lytton contest:

Sunburned and lost, Jake tightened the noose around Randy’s diaper-white neck and growled, “Any last words, varmint?” to which Randy replied, “Don’t be afraid to go out on a limb, Jake--that’s where all the fruit is!” which marked the first and last time Jake and the boys hired a life coach to lead one of their cattle drives.

---Lisa Kluber, San Francisco (Runner-Up---Western)

I wonder if he tried to get them to bond with rocks ....

Why is Vistaprint better than say, Zazzle?

I've been loyal to Vistaprint because the routinely run crazy cheap sales, plus, their interactive design tool is pretty easy to use.

I've never used zazzle, so I have no actual comparison.

We have an Argentinian carnivore's delight in town - Fogo de Chao (can't do the tilde over the "a", but you get the idea). I didn't realize they'd opened ... I thought all the guys wandering around in their waiter's outfits were some kind of karmic retribution for my maligning gaucho pants on the board.

If I were working, I would suggest that we go. When I get a job, we shall. I love that place.

cheesy bread balls

Oh my son's BFF's mom is Brazilian and she makes those for us sometimes. I have to physically take the container away from my son for the drive home or he will eat them all. His BFFs (twins) don't like them anymore since they get them all the time, my son thinks they are CRAZY!

(I say half because a whole batch uses 2 eggs, so half a batch would be 1 egg, and I can't fathom subdividing below 1 egg.)

Hah. I have occasionally had to figure out like, 1/3rd of 3 and 3/4 cups flour, or somesuch nonsense, because you have to divide the recipe by a divisible number of eggs. Though I think at least once I've used pourable egg or egg subsitute (like Egg Beaters) because that's easier to divvy up ("one and a half eggs!")

don't like them anymore since they get them all the time

I should probably not attempt to test this theory.

This is why I use Mastercook! It does the math for me! Although it does occasionally come up with baffling things from time to time.

I round up. Usually a little extra egg never hurts anything.

I use fractions of eggs pretty often. Half an egg's worth of pancake batter makes a pretty standard -t breakfast, for example. I just measure the egg (I go by weight but I can't imagine it matters if you'd rather do volume), whip the yolk and white together and take out whatever fraction I need (it all gloms together, but I don't care very much about being precise) and feed the rest to the dog. I don't think it would be practical without the dog.

I haven't used anything besides Vistaprint, because of the crazy sales and it's super easy to use.

My friend Nikki had her first show for her necklaces tonight, and my other friend Stef has gone down to .5 time at her home care job to start her own graphic design biz, and I was drooling over her glossy, rounded cards...but I remembered the whole "can't write on" thing.

I think I will spring on better card stock next time, though.

Nik had the show at my friend J's bro's photog studio, and I'm a gonna be doing their website rewrite, AND they took a huge stack of cards, because they mostly work with professional photogs who hate writing. SCORE!

And I got (another) owl necklace. Once Nik gets her website up, I will totally pimp it out, because they are cute, $12 and you can get a custom design easy....like say, naked John Barrowman or a...anything, really. Also, magnets. I am going to have her make some Wordslinger magnets when I get my logo done...by S. In exchange for word work on HER website. And J's mechanic husband said he would redo my freon for $20 and a bottle of Freon

GodDAMN, is there anything better than having a multifaceted circle of friends?! (And I include y'all in that.)

Also, I wore makeup, a dress and heels. Damn, my feet hurt.