We're kinda like Hotel California, only not as creepy, and with less stellar guitar work.

We're totally creepy! We're the good kind of creepy!

Congrats, Laga!

And because I figure it should be a separate post: may I please ask for hairpats and general soothing? Our household has been a swirling mass of stress for the past couple of days, and I am hitting the not-coping wall pretty hard. With a side-order of feeling unmotivated and untalented.

Laga, that's wonderful!

Congrats Laga, on finding love and making choices to bring love to you. I know monogamy isn't for everyone, but if it works, yay!

Oh Jilli, massive ~ma heading your way. I was hanging out with the younger Gillian and thinking of you lots this week. I hope you know how much love and support there is for you.

Oh Jilli, I'm sorry that things are stressful right now. We'll get through this, and hopefully our sojourn in the Land of Not-Coping will be short.

Much love to you, my dear. I wish I could make it better for you.

{{{{{{Nora, Erin, Maria}}}}}} {{{{{{{{Jilli}}}}}}}}}}

Woot, Laga!

Hairpats and virtual chocolate to you, Jilli. Would it help to talk about it?

Maria, I'm continuing to send the ~ma for you and your DH. Just the thought of what you're going through is terrifying; I'm so sorry this is happening.

I'm extra-aware of how I appear to be coming off here, because I haven't been as active over the past few years, yet when I do post, it's always to ask for something for me and/or my family.

I know this feeling well, especially after going through so much with M's family this past year or so -- sometimes I feel like it's all I talk about, with you guys and with other friends too, and I often make a conscious effort not to. But from the outside, I can tell you that I'm always glad to see your pixels here, and I feel enriched to know about what's going on in your life, and in other Buffistas' lives, even when it's sad or scary or stressful. There's no shame in asking for help or comfort when you need it. You are beloved to us and we want to be here for you.

Would it help to talk about it?

Well, there's the stress of being the primary breadwinner of the house and being unemployed/job-hunting, there's the never-ending tilt-a-whirl of dealing with the Lyme disease, there's the fiction project I'm working on that could be awesome if I would just stop freaking out (you would think that my agent saying nice things about the bit she's read would help, but no), and on top of all that: Pete and I have lost our hearts and minds, and are bringing home two tiny kittens on Friday. Which means a whirlwind of kitten-proofing the house. Oh, and one of our two current cats is peeing in random places, but we don't know which cat.

Ahahahaha. Oh, and prep for the gothy vendor market I'm selling at later this month.

deep breath

So. I'm stressed. t /understatement

Oh, wow. Lots of stuff. I send peace and fortitude and burning, pure love to Laura and Maria and Jilli. I send healing vibes and big virtual smooches to Erin and Nora and Hil and Jilli (seeing on fb that you have a migraine). I send silly happy grinning jigs of joy to Laga - it is hard and brave to be patient and accepting of one's evolution, says the former gold star lesbian.

And now I'm going to share some happies. I met for coffee this morning with a fabulous contractor trainer who ISTG *must* be the same MB type as I am, since we gabbed happily for two solid hours. He is a terrific support/contact/mentor and is even going to give me a little pro bono training on something I could turn into an income stream. And dayeinu ("it would have been enough" for the goyim) but he then took me by a place I've been meaning to go for a year and gave me a personal intro to the ED who's at her wits' end right now and needs a wide range of my skills badly. Can she pay me at the moment? No. But she'll wear my ass out with relevant work so I can sleep and write me a killer letter of rec, and that is sweet psychic money in the bank and karma to this girl. And she's got not one, but TWO people working for her who are pretty clearly trans* and/or just living genderqueer, which is awesome. She and I hit it off instantly, and she had tears in her eyes five minutes into our conversation - this is a "yat" in her 50s who prides herself on stoicism.

I still need to apply for that other job, but I'm going to keep working all the angles until I get something.

Seekrit message to Nora: I'll be learning window restoration at Mac's this weekend and I just told Michelle that I'm in for HG SG big time.

And now? I'm going to take a nap, because I was up until 4 am last night and up at 9 to meet Bill.

I made it through the session I wanted to see. Combination of TENS and Vicodin helped a lot. Then I saw some people I knew and talked to them, and now I'm back at my hotel room and resting for a little while before going back for another talk I want to see. The hotel and the convention center are connected with those habitrail-type walkway things.