However, according to my hair stylist (I got my hair cut last week), I still have no grey/white/silver hair. None. I can only assume there is a wig in an attic somewhere that is slowly going grey.

I'm jealous. Tho' I don't take greys as a sign of age, as they started showing up in my early 20's. Thank goodness for blonde hair that still disguises them, so I still haven't had to pay to cover them up. I'm hoping mine will just go like my Dad's - he transitioned so cleanly from blonde to white there was never a clear line and some people still think he's blonde.

I continue to be very, very grateful that I never had kids, but part of me misses them at this point in my life. I know it's for the wrong reasons, though, because I'm missing the dream of having family around me in my old(er) age.

Oh, Connie, this is 100% me. I don't want kids at all, but thinking about not having family as I age is a little sad-making. Tim has fantastic nieces and nephews, and I'm truly grateful for that, but it's still not the same.

I overheard my mother (whose health is deteriorating and depends more on me all the time) recently on the phone saying she worries about me because who will take care of me when I get old like I take care of her? She was mildly comforted that my best friend promised to take on the job, just in case.

I'm still not 100% sure whether I want kids, but REALLY HATE the feeling that it's becoming less of an option all the time.

Oh, and filling out a form earlier this week, I had to cross out and rewrite my work address because I screwed it up - it's all 1's and 6's, but I got the arrangement of them wrong. Still agree that the way she asked came off as either snotty or insulting, though.

I found turning 40 back in April to be pretty uneventful. I've had grey hair since my late 20's.

Yow. I won't even admit how many calories I eat if I'm trying to lose weight. It's so far beyond 1500 I'm a little croggled. (Granted, I am a large human being, so my caloric needs are large, and "cutting back" still leaves me with more calories than smaller people eat just to maintain.)

Didn't mean to make you feel bad! It's just what I've found to work for me - the place between being HUNGRY and taking in too many calories to lose weight is 1500-1800 calories a day. The rest of my family seems to think 1200 calories a day is dieting, which, well, I tried that and couldn't make it even one day. (Granted, they are all smaller persons than I am.)

I've never wanted kids, and never regretted not having them. The idea of being surrounded by a large loving family in one's old age is a fond one, but I know many people with lots of children/siblings who aren't close and aren't getting taken care of by family in their old age. Having kids is no guarantee that anyone will nursemaid you when you're 80 or sick. Banking all the money you'd have spent raising them and having a good lawyer, OTOH, is a pretty good bet. (Not that I'm banking jack, myself. I'm putting all my spare money into paying off my house.)

However, I know a woman who's in her early fifties who just had two babies in three years. Both totally healthy, full-term, easy pregnancy, no complications at all. So, you know, it is possible. Just like it's totally possible for a woman who's not in the high-risk category to have a difficult pregnancy. I don't think (based on my vast experience of, um, listening to other women talk) that a pre-menopausal woman should feel like she's "too old to have kids" just because of statistical averages.

I also know two women who were told they were infertile, adopted babies, and almost immediately got pregnant. Maybe there's something hormonal that happens when a woman's around babies a lot that revs her own baby-making system up? Can I get a grant to study that?

Banking all the money you'd have spent raising them and having a good lawyer, OTOH, is a pretty good bet.

Unless Greece defaults and sets off a chain reaction that messes up the entire banking system. But then, if the entire socio-economic system gets wiped out, our putative offspring would probably be too busy tilling Viscount Koch's fields to care for their elders.

Yow. I won't even admit how many calories I eat if I'm trying to lose weight. It's so far beyond 1500 I'm a little croggled. (Granted, I am a large human being, so my caloric needs are large, and "cutting back" still leaves me with more calories than smaller people eat just to maintain.)

Didn't mean to make you feel bad!

Oh, I don't feel bad; I should have been clearer. I'm just bemused that I can eat a comparative TON and still lose weight. But, you know, that's a function of my current weight being so high. I'm cool with it.

However, I know a woman who's in her early fifties who just had two babies in three years.

We're friends with a couple who recently found out they're expecting -- the wife is 44 and the husband is 63. They're thrilled beyond thrilled, but they know that the husband's age does mean that statistically he might not even see his kid graduate high school. But, you know, shit happens to everyone; people who have kids in their 20s get hit by a bus and don't see their kid graduate high school.

I think it would be hard to have an infant/toddler in my mid-60s, but our friend is really optimistic about his energy levels. And it's their family, their lives, their choice.

THE CUBE IS EMPTY. YOU MAY REMOVE THE CUBE. IOW, everything is in my house! Now I just have to unpack and arrange it all, oy... My friend who helped me with the biggish stuff (tall bookshelf, dresser, cedar chest) is smaller than I am, but a hoss. Damn I love a woman who knows how to lift heavy objects. In related news, I am now a sweaty, sweaty monkey.

Etiquette note: if one is going to a book signing for the husband of a college friend to meet said husband and another friend for the first time, is one expected to buy a copy of the book? If one is unemployed? I would like to read his books eventually...

Also, ABF U-pack is the bomb dig. I had not a single issue with them on either end, they picked my stuff up in NC on Friday and delivered it here Tuesday, and I loved that I could reserve two cubes and only pay what I used. And did I mention, for one third the price of a POD(S)? And cheaper than renting a U-haul, not to mention much less hassle. And three days to load, three to unload, not counting day of delivery, and a big truck in the street for 20 minutes instead of hours and hours? Total win. Couldn't have done it without all my fabulous friends, though. Bless 'em all.

I think when you and your friends get to a certain age there's a lot of talk about how people are having difficulties with pregnancies which keeps those of us who didn't have any problems quiet because we don't want to rub salt in a wound.

Speaking as an "old but still got her fingers crossed that she'll pull it off" chick I think its important to hear the "it went fine" side as well. Sensitivity is great and important and I'm all for it, but "problems" aren't the entire story. I've known several people now who were shocked that they didn't have any problems conceiving after 35. Infertility at that point doesn't become inevitable, it just becomes more likely.

The pendulum seems to have swung from infertility being a deep, dark, shameful, secret to almost being seen as a norm. Which is weird.

I was quite upsetting last year when my ob started talking about advanced maternal age and then informed me that yes, I do fall into that realm. It's also been hard finding secondary infertility support groups - everything I've found so far has been primary.

I've heard this from other people as well. I hope the discussion reaches a tipping point soon, Aims... and that you won't need it once it does.

Ok, done spamming the thread with my silliness.

YOU TAKE THAT BACK, LAURA! NEVER STOP SPAMMING THE THREAD WITH YOUR SILLINESS!

I also know two women who were told they were infertile, adopted babies, and almost immediately got pregnant. Maybe there's something hormonal that happens when a woman's around babies a lot that revs her own baby-making system up? Can I get a grant to study that?

There's certainly enough anecdata around the phenomenon. My VERY non-woowoo BiL's admittedly bs pet theory is that caring for a newborn exposes you to stem cells at a crazy rate. He's been surprised to see the arthritis he's struggled with since a brown recluse bite in his 20s easing considerably in the year + he's been a father. It makes evolutionary sense enough -- raising a small child is taxing as hell, its good if the little nipper actually physically benefits you in SOME way.

Went to the podiatrist today. One of the scars has developed a small scab so he took a scalpel to it and removed a disolving stitch that hadn't so much disolved. He's very happy with my recovery and doesn't need to see me again until September. He said if I have any pain or swelling over the summer with the heat I should come and see him.

As long as I was there I went to the GP as well -- I've been dealing with a nasty bout of bronchitis for the past week and change and figured I'd check in. I'm deffinately improved but my heart rate was elevated so he did an EKG. Thankfully it was fine as was my blood pressure (which always is). We're attributing the fast pulse to the infection and a bit of dehydration. Since lung problems are pretty unusual for me I have a scrip for a chest x-ray if this goes on for another week. So, rest, fluids, keep taking the codeine... like that.

Can I say how much I like having health insurance again? And how much I love my doctors? How much I appreciate their care and caution? And how crazy-making it is that this is not the norm?

I wouldn't worry about buying the book, smonster. They'll understand, knowing you just moved and don't have a job yet.

Happy birthday, Cass!

I am another buffista who had her kids after 35. I did have some problems getting pregnant, but then I had two easy pregnancies and two wonderful kids.

One of whom graduated kindergarten today. It seems unpossible, and yet there you go.