I'd like to do more than just glare at Nora's bitch-ass cousin.

Henceforth, whenever Nora's cousin wants something - be it at the store, the movies, etc - may it be out of stock, discontinued, sold out, or just plain non-existant. And may she never, ever, ever be able to wear any of the rings that she maliciously and despicably stole from your grandmother, the loathsome being that she is. Whenever she goes to wear any of the rings, may her gingers either sweel or shrink to sizes that will forever cause her to not know her ring size.

Evil bitca.

Java, thank you SO MUCH. I just sent this email to my division directors based on that website:

Dear [division directors]:

I spoke briefly with [dean] today about the situation with the laptop, and she recommended that I make an appointment with one of you to discuss the laptop situation and find a time when we can speak to [business director aka TINO] (or, if something is happening behind the scenes, please let me know to hold off for now) since she has no time this week and will be out on Monday. I know this week is really busy for all of us, but [Tino] leaves on Tuesday. Perhaps we can talk on Monday?

I also wanted to share with you something I found as I investigated California law about this type of accident. According to the California government's website [link] ,it doesn't look like it is actually legal for [school name] to hold employees responsible for this type of damage. I have cut and pasted a portion of this website and highlighted what looks to be the relevant sections below. By legal definitions, accidents such as mine do not rise to "gross negligence" (since I did not willfully attempt to hurt my laptop and am not indifferent to others or to consequences) but are rather accidents or simple negligence (see below). As you know, [ND] and I own a small business ourselves, and this is how we have always dealt with accidents our employees have made; simply part of the wear and tear of the business.

Believe me, the last thing I want to do is cause conflict when I am taking on a new leadership role, and I have no intention of taking legal action. However, I am trying to be a strong advocate for myself; I'm taking [Head of School]'s graduation speech to heart here and am speaking out rather than playing nice the way women are so often taught to do. I would so appreciate your insight into this situation.

If you would like to share this email with [Head of School], please feel free to do so. I didn't think I should bother her with it at this point but will leave it to your discretion.

Q. If I break or damage company property or lose company money while performing my job, can my employer deduct the cost/loss from my wages?

A. No, your employer cannot legally make such a deduction from your wages if, by reason of mistake or accident a cash shortage, breakage, or loss of company property/equipment occurs. The California courts have held that losses occurring without any fault on the part of the employee or that are merely the result of simple negligence are inevitable in almost any business operation and thus, the employer must bear such losses as a cost of doing business. For example, if you accidentally drop a tray of dishes, take a bad check, or have a customer walkout without paying a check, your employer cannot deduct the loss from your paycheck.

There is an exception to the foregoing contained in the Industrial Welfare Commission Wage Orders that purports to provide the employer the right to deduct from an employee’s wages for any cash shortage, breakage or loss of equipment if the employer can show that the shortage, breakage or loss is caused by a dishonest or willful act, or by the employee’s gross negligence. What this means is that a deduction may be legal if the employer proves that the loss resulted from the employee’s dishonesty, willfulness, or grossly negligent act. Under this regulation, a simple accusation does not give the employer the right to make the deduction. The DLSE has cautioned that use of this deduction contained in the IWC regulations may, in fact, not comply with the provisions of the California Labor Code and various California Court decisions. Furthermore, DLSE does not automatically assume that an employee was dishonest, acted willfully or was grossly negligent when an employer asserts such as a justification for making a deduction from an employee’s wages to cover a shortage, breakage, or loss to property or equipment.

Legal Definitions from ca.gov:

negligence:

Negligence means the omission to do something (continued...)

( continues...) that a reasonable person, guided by those considerations that ordinarily regulate the conduct of human affairs, would do, or the doing of something that a prudent and reasonable person would not do. Negligence is not an absolute term, but a relative one, and whether or not a particular act or omission constitutes negligence depends by definition on the particular circumstances, considering especially the time, place, and persons involved. A determination of negligence is a legal conclusion that can only be arrived at by a court of law.

gross negligence:

"Gross" negligence has been defined as an extreme departure from the ordinary standard of conduct, as an entire failure to exercise care, as the exercise of so slight a degree of care as to justify the belief that there was an indifference to the interest and welfare of others, and as that want of care that raises a presumption of conscious indifference to consequences. A determination of gross negligence is a legal conclusion that can only be arrived at by a court of law.

I am out of metaphorical spoons. But not out of packing to be done. Dammit.

I may have just brought an almighty shitstorm down on myself. I hope not. I hate that standing up for myself might result in Bad Stuff.

I hope for the best possible outcome.

I hate that standing up for myself might result in Bad Stuff.

Just so. But not standing up for yourself would surely be worse. I hope they take the opportunity you gave them to back down. Their whole attitude has been disgraceful.

P.S. Nora's cousin and business guy Tino should get married and torment each other. Oh, and one of them should have a torrid affair with Vortex's pharmacy person that ends badly.

P.S. Nora's cousin and business guy Tino should get married and torment each other.

That would then afford them the opportunity to get divorced, whereupon Nora's cousin could steal all of business guy Tino's stuff, and B.G. Tino could bill her for it.