Sometimes the amount of family stuff there is feels like an avalanche poised to fall on me head. My mother was known as a Keeper, so she ended up with some pretty remote family stuff, like my great-aunt's husband's mother's bed. My father was the only child on his mother's side, so that river of stuff everyone has, like china and silver, flowed down to us. His only cousin got most of the stuff from Dad's father's parents, since she was the one in town, although she still felt ill-used about the furniture we got. As far as I know, only my mother really cares; she holds grudges close.

The hard part is that sense of obligation that these things should go to someone who would remember who they belonged to and what they meant.

No seaweedy Steph.

Seska, I'd be tempted to just publish a missive to your offending relative consisting of an engraved hand with thumb and three fingers tucked. I have no patience with people of that mind, and tend to let them babble and stew in their own bile. Being careful not to get any on me, of course. I hope it settles down soon and you can get past it.

Teppy, it's a lovely thing. 10kt, so no real monetary value. But it's charmingly engraved, and the portrait we had done shows her wearing it on the satin neckpiece tied around her throat. I have a copy of the photo. Plans have always been to frame the portrait in a shadowbox with the bar pin displayed with the picture. May do it still.

Yeah, definitely breathe! Sounds like you are making the right call. I`m totally texting one of my students right now saying you can`t control other people`s behaviour, only your reaction to it. Seems like it`s time for you to draw the line.
 
Family pieces: I claimed my grandmother`s Japanese embroidery by numbers of this giant tiger because it wasn`t really my mom`s taste. And I have this hundred year old go table made from a single (huge) piece of wood. It used to belong to my mom`s cousin`s family before they were interned, but my mom got it because her family moved into their house to keep them from losing it. She just returned a teak and marble washstand that she had similarly when they were living in Hawaii last. Her cousin`s son says he remembered it from his childhood. Most families who were interned weren`t so lucky.

Oh, I'm sure you won't have to worry about THAT.

Considering her plan for her Halloween costumes for the rest of her life is: kitty, zombie, zombie kitty, vampire with Auntie Jilli, then no, I probably don't need to worry.

You train them well, Jilli-Wan.

That sounds so weird.

Thanks, Beverly. I'm past it, though. Well, mostly. I'm a bit of a sensitive soul. I'll be fine! Family stuff is irritating as all hell.

Get re-married? Take out a billboard apologizing abjectly for ruining *his* big day? Maybe offer to cut off a finger in penance?

I should totally do the billboard thing. Preferably one right outside my grandmother's house. I'm more than a bit irritated that neither he nor my grandmother has noticed that this was the one day of my life and Sharon's that was about us, and NOT about him. On the plus side, my adorable mother let me RAAAAR at her about it until I felt better. I am really exceptionally lucky at having only the one or two craxy relatives. Even Sharon's family, with whom things have been very difficult at times, were just *wonderful* during the wedding. I thought I was going to cry when her mother and my mother read the ketubah in Hebrew and English respectively. I have the best photo of the two of them hugging!

I have officially made an appointment with a lawyer to discuss my car accident. The Evil Other Insurance Company (EOIC) has decided that my medical bills are 20% my responsibility because of my "negligence." How I was negligent by going the speed limit through an intersection with a green light, I'm not sure. Dammit.

I no longer smell like anything I didn't want to smell like. Yay indoor plumbing and soap.

Plans have always been to frame the portrait in a shadowbox with the bar pin displayed with the picture.

Oooh, definitely do that. It would be lovely!

I should totally do the billboard thing. Preferably one right outside my grandmother's house. I'm more than a bit irritated that neither he nor my grandmother has noticed that this was the one day of my life and Sharon's that was about us, and NOT about him.

What a knob. I'm glad you could vent to your mother (and here) and not let it become a Big Thing that takes over your brain and takes away from the memory of what was an amazing day.

The Evil Other Insurance Company (EOIC) has decided that my medical bills are 20% my responsibility because of my "negligence." How I was negligent by going the speed limit through an intersection with a green light, I'm not sure. Dammit.

Oh, HELL naw. How dare you be driving when one of their covered drivers was also driving, anywhere, at any time! EOIC are also knobs.

Yep. But I got a good lawyer rec from my chiropractor and have begun that fun process. I'm just so annoyed that it came to this. I spoke to my adjuster at Progressive (who, for the record, have been amazing throughout this whole process; I'd recommend them to anyone) today, and she sighed and said, "Oh [my real name], I know you were trying to avoid this. I can't recommend anything, but, off the record, they're being total pains and I'm glad you are getting a lawyer. Don't forget that you are entitled to PAIN AND SUFFERING too." (She's gotten to know me pretty well by now and has been really annoyed by the other insurance company.)

The hard part is that sense of obligation that these things should go to someone who would remember who they belonged to and what they meant.

Yes, this.

God, so tired. Many many things gone from the house, some of which I got money for. Did manage to get a nap. More help coming tomorrow! Thank heavens for friends. Need to eat, change clothes and go socialize, have no energy to cook but shouldn't eat out. Pronouns gone. Made one last stop at the local hardware and said goodbye to the guy who's been at the cash register since I started as a carpenter in 1998, feeling a little sentimental about that. I liked having a hardware store where they know my name.

Pronouns gone.

Did you get rid of them on Craigslist?