So, tonight was the memorial service for my Uncle Steve. It was...exactly what he would have wanted. It was at the kind of hall that can be rented for weddings, sort of like a VFW. Very casual. His kids (you know, "kids" my age) had made up t-shirts with pictures of him on them. The hall opened up to an outdoor area with a gazebo (for weddings, I guess) and a wee pond. There were people playing cornhole by the pond, and a dude with a Casio keyboard playing Uncle Steve's favorite music, and (Tim and I got there too late for this) some people who got up and spoke.
There was a crapload -- like, a crapload and a half -- of pictures of him and various family members. And I realized that I literally don't know when the last time I saw him was. My guess is 8-10 years ago. And so the more recent pictures really made me sad -- he had massive damage to his heart from a heart attack, so not much of the muscle worked any more. And because of that, he had a fair amount of edema and was very puffy and pale. But still, in all the pictures, he was smiling and happy. There was even a picture of him in the hospital with one of those shower cap thingies you have to wear for surgery, and he looked pleased as you can be.
My dad had 7 siblings; 2 of his brothers died back in the 80s, leaving 6 of them. And now they're down to 5 (including Dad). And the youngest one, my Uncle Dutch, who is the only one who never had any of the heart problems the rest of them did (seriously; it got to be a running joke that maybe he had a different dad from the rest of them) is in really, REALLY bad shape. Oh my god. I don't know what's wrong, but he's horribly, rail-thin, and jaundiced, and...just looks very very bad. Dad and my other aunts and uncles kept saying, "Dutch is going to be next, and it's going to be soon."
Dad told Uncle Dutch to get to the hospital, and Uncle Dutch got annoyed with Dad. What can you do, though? You love your family, so you feel like you have to at least say something, that it's the least you can do, and sometimes all you can do.
It was hard, and weird -- I hadn't seen a lot of my aunts and uncles in at least 5 years, and even longer for my cousins. But it was also good to see them. And Tim was a trouper, getting a bushel full of relatives sprung on him that he'd never met before, and meeting them all at once.
But, now -- ENOUGH. No more bad stuff, please. That includes for my Buffistas (Drew, bonny, etc.) and their loved ones.
That's good that it's what he would have wanted, Steph. He sounds like a great guy. I hope your Uncle Dutch gets seen to soon. I'm assuming it's the same doctor-avoidance-stubbornness a lot of men have?
Things are a little bit better tonight. Once Mom decided she was done with the projects for the moment and kinda came back to the land of the living...
I'm going to haul my laptop downstairs and start baking a devil's food cake from scratch.
Continued ~ma for the many Buffistas who need it. It's been a rough year, hasn't it?
That's good that it's what he would have wanted, Steph. He sounds like a great guy.
The obit in the paper started with -- I shit you not -- "Our Elvis has left the building." He was an Elvis fanatic -- had a whole room in the house with memorabilia, paintings, etc. He even looked somewhat like Elvis (fat older Elvis), which was a deliberate cultivation on his part.
And yeah, he was a very, very goodhearted man, despite his actual ticker not working so well.
I hope your Uncle Dutch gets seen to soon. I'm assuming it's the same doctor-avoidance-stubbornness a lot of men have?
I think so. And/or denial.
Just got back from lunch. Ran into both brothers (that aren't in gaol) - one of them while on the phone with him. We shall do lunch next week.
I'm glad to hear it was a fitting memorial, Steph.
I'm screwed for being a single childless woman. It's a child & family specialty practice.
Spidra, I wouldn't assume that a child and family specialty practice would turn you away for being single. My friend is an MFCC at a similar practice and she definitely sees single, adult clients.
Skipping to shamelessly post new photos of baby starting here! [link]
KYOOOOTE!!! Ded. He has such an expressive face.
Sorry about the awful day for Drew. Yay for no infection though. Turning point ~ma.
I've caught up! Whew. So much going on. Tons and tons of ~ma to everyone! Drew! Bonny! Spidra! Sean! Hugs for them that like them. I'm guessing ND got into the surgery? any word yet? Bonny? How are you over there?
I now have feeding tube #1 in my nose today.
Yup. Been there. Well, the tube up the nose part. Mine was for extracting blockage, not feeding. Either way, not the most enjoyable thing in the world. Hang in there buddy. You are doing great.
I don't believe anybody really likes me or is being honest with me.
Folks have already piped in on this one, but it bears repeating. Dude, you are well liked. And while even the best of us can be an ass sometimes, don't misunderstand that as your friends not liking you. {{{{{ }}}}}
Hey California types. Is it a correct statement to say, "If you are driving NORTH on the PCH, then the ocean is NOT to your right." ?
Ha! Didn't you live out here?? Pfft.
I have been drinking a concoction of orange juice, Emergen-C (1000mg of C, plus B7 and B12), protein powder and psyllium fiber. It's like rocket fuel.
Oh dear jeebus! That much vitamin C would have me running to the loo. Repeatedly.
I do feel a bit blinvisible here
I see you. Just taking forever to respond. Stupid work and all. Hey, now that you are here in SoCal, we need to get together for a mini f2f!
ION- At work, one of my co-workers returned to campus (off contract for the summer) and announced her last day is Oct 4th. She handles all tech needs for dept of music, thus relieving my position of a LOT of work. I am not looking forward to her departing. However, with her leaving, I'm apt to try and ask her out. (must figure out how to do that, and work up the nerve).
IOON, watching Queen Jane. To see a young Helena Bonham Carter and young Cary Elwes. Adorable! Amazing how they were both cute then, and now.
IOOON- switching back and forth from the Compaq laptop to the MacBook Pro: The Mac track pad is much more awesome! But the curved plastic edges of the Compaq are easier on the wrists.
Now I should be off to bed. I have to be at work 2 hours earlier tomorrow. Oy.
