Hang in there, sj. I wish I was closer so I could lend a hand, but there's lots of blinvisible support coming your way.

And in a separate post, congratulate me (said tongue firmly in cheek), I've just discovered my first illegal download of STARS. Three books in and I'm finally good enough to be considered to be pirated.

What I love, by which I mean hate with the heat of a thousand fiery suns, is how these fuckers try to make it seem like they're providing a public service.

Bastards.

Barb, you will appreciate this post.

I think I read that before, P-C, but it's always a good refresher. Fave line:

If I were only in it for the money, I would be doing something else for a living, like selling my kidneys.

Seriously!

erin_o, as someone who has consistently chosen the inappropriate guy in life, I guess I sort of identify with your sister. When I was 16, my boyfriend was 22 and I was forbidden to spend time with him. We dated in secret for 2 years and then I married the next good boy I met because I felt guilty for having disappointed my parents so much. We got divorced three years later. The thing about my 22 year old boyfriend was that I never had PIV sex with him because I was afraid if getting pregnant. I know that is unusual, but my point is, I guess, that I think those around her need to give her a little space to make her own mistakes and give her access to what she needs to stay safe. And it sounds like that has happened.

(((sj))) I hope the rest of the day goes better!

((Barb)) I've seen a couple searches looking for torrents of my album but as far as I know no one has posted it yet. And every time I see those search terms, it pisses me off. We're not even talking profit - the costs of making my album aren't even paid off yet. And since I'm indie, it means I paid all of those costs myself.

Great link, P-C.

I spent most of yesterday trying to draft a pattern up at least 6 sizes. Since I actually know nothing technical about how to draft patterns, this consists of looking at the pattern piece for visual cues to angles and ratios and extrapolating from there. This is a very weak part of my brain. By 6pm I was braindead from the effort.

Today will consist of more of the same but first I have to bake some cupcakes. I'm going to a cupcake and champagne tweetup tonight. It will be a small get-together with actors, producers, composers, crew....and me.

Hang in there, sj. I wish I was closer so I could lend a hand, but there's lots of blinvisible support coming your way.

That's sweet. I really appreciate the blinvisible support from everyone and in general just having a safe place to rant.

So it took us about an hour walking the streets of downton Worcester to find the SS office (no signage and awful google directions), but I finally officially changed my name. It turns out I can re-apply for SSI benefits, which is a giant pain in the ass and I could still be turned down. It would be based on my earned income rather than on my father's, so even if I do get it, it will be for significantly less money.

Then after that very long morning Mom and I went out for much needed margaitas!

Empress, I meant to say in my last post. Yay, you!!!

today my body has entered the coughing phase of the common cold. fever is down to "normal" (i.e. under 99 degrees, but still higher than my usual 97.2). I'm seriously considering calling in sick to work tomorrow, largely because i HATE it when people come in sick to our completely airlocked work space and spread their ick (which is totally where i got this round of ick from.)

and a new spin on the sister love situation, last night i asked how josh was taking the situation, if he felt like he was punished as much as she has been. her response: "i know he's hurting as much as i am.. i haven't been able to talk to him since yesterday night. i called to tell him what happened[1]. we were both in tears.. >.< other than that, i dunno. "

Immediately my mind split in two directions: 1) he's REALLY good at emotional manipulation 2) he actually does love her as much as he says he does ("love" being her phrase, not mine. They were professing "love" after knowing each other all of a couple weeks)

If scenario #2 were true....then i'd feel really bad for my extremely non-friendly thoughts towards this guy. After a very troubled sleep (not troubled by this situation, but by coughing and general sickliness) i'm starting to think that she was crying so hard that she likely projected her own misery onto his uncomfortable silences.

[1] "what happened" was a school admin seeing the two of them canoodling on the library sofa and calling her mom. then parental blowup. blowup which clearly has not cut her off from phone or internet contact, so not nearly as severe as earlier blowups.

Thanks for the feedback everyone. I was one of those boring late bloomers who didn't date until i was 17 and didn't even consider having sex until college, so i have no personal reference for this outside of fiction.