My mother famously keeps various crystals in her bra("famously" in that her darling children give her shit about it).

I am disinclined to purchase a cellphone if it can't be stuffed in my clevage or the watch pocket of my jeans.

Hmm. Maybe I'll make some scones or something and eat them for breakfast/freeze the rest. I was noticing currants in my cupboard, and those go into scones, yeah?

Well they certainly don't go in your bra.

That's what you say!

Anyway, I'm thwarted due to a lack of flour. Ah well.

Not just you, java. And I was drinking it even before that.

Got fatass food for Loki. So far, think he likes it. I mixed it in with his regular, now to see if it results in gastric issues or not and he was picking it out. It's a helluva lot cheaper than what I am feeding him now (a lamb and rice brand.) Main issue is if the other cats prefer it, since they are each on their own prescript foods (Devi for digestive, MK for diabetes.)

I think Dita ate one of the dowels I need to (have Matt H) put my TV stand together.

Mmm. The pineapple I chopped up was adequately advertised as sweet. This stuff is like crack.

My husband, the bartender, has invented The Gulf Slick. Coconut vodka, blue curacao, with a layer of Jager floated on top.

DJ, that's brilliant. I want one.

So, I need some advice to give my friend G. What to do when a guy she's dumped keeps calling. Like, continuously. He calls, starts shouting, she says conversation's over and hangs up. He keeps calling. She doesn't answer. He hangs up on voicemail and calls back. Again and again. She unplugs the phone and goes to bed. Six hours later, she plugs the phone back in. It rings in her hand. It's him. He's been calling continuously for six hours. They have a shouting match. Tonight she's expecting him to call and start shouting again. She's just resigned to the shouting match now. I don't know what to say, besides telling her to shoot him.