It's not a very logical system, it seems to be. Just because a paycheck can cover the child's medical needs, what about food, or gas or clothes or what have you? These are the kinds of things that just don't seemed to be considered very logically.
I am very sorry, Kat. You're doing everything you can, and it seems like the system is punishing for doing your best to be a working parent and provide for a high-needs child. Children. Dang. I'm so sorry.
msbelle, I don't understand a lot about ODD; I just know that I saw several teens have ODD as a diagnosis, and it helped staff to know it, because then we could present things as "Well, you will choose to do what you will choose to do. No one is forcing you. But X choice will have X consequence, and it's totally up to you if you want to see that happen: Y choice will have Y consequence."
A lot of times, they still choose X. Didn't make it less frustrating to watch. BUT many times, they were able, afterwards, to draw the connnection between their choices and consequences, and could start to modify their Bx.
And these were teens who had Mac-like issues, but no one had ever loved them, and worked with them like you do with Mac, so it CAN get better, I promise. He has a huge chance, because of you, and I know it doesn't feel like it now. But it's there.