I don't remember my near-death experience (fall down go boom, aka my face, my beautiful face!), but I apparently came up punching in the ER when they were trying to sew the cut near my eye. Good times.

I was on Maine Street (yes - they spell it like that in some towns there) and about five seconds after I passed it, an air conditoner fell from a third story window. Missed me by just a few yards.

I was in the path of a runaway bulldozer/front loader. Very odd watching it roll down an alley in North Beach, curve onto Broadway and then roll towards me. But it kept hooking so I didn't have to dodge it or anything, and the blade rammed into a brick wall taking out a chunk. But I was a good 20 feet away.

But there was a brief moment when it was rolling down hill and I didn't know which way it would go where I was mentally preparing myself for Dodge the Bulldozer.

I was walking in Uptown once the morning after a big storm. Suddenly I heard a loud crack, and a big-ass tree branch landed about 10 feet in front of me. Yeah, it was big enough to seriously injure or kill me. Weird, as there was no wind at the time - the branch must have been severely weakened by the storm.

Makes me think of that episode of All In the Family where Archie is almost killed by something falling at work. So Meathead says, "Did it occur to you that maybe God was trying to kill you - and missed?"

aka my face, my beautiful face!

Still beautiful.

I was in a car accident once that where the door right next to me was very nearly hit by a car going at highway speed, but the driver managed to brake and swerve just in time. Didn't get the life flashing before my eyes thing, just an "Oh, fuck," reaction.

My mother lived in Mexico City for a while (she won't tell us why), and was on a bus or tram that stopped. She didn't speak enough Spanish to know why or when it was going to start up again, so she just got off and started walking. People were yelling at her, but, still not with the Spanish-speaking.

Turned out there were fallen power cables blocking the way, and she was stepping right over the live juice.

She decided to take Spanish lessons.

Her sister had an intruder threaten to rape and kill her. She talked him out of it. Her success was one of the reasons she went into psychiatry. The other reason was the corpse in the morgue that sat up at her.

I don't always know how to take her stories.

I think I told y'all that my favorite story like that is when Mrs. Emanuel heard teenaged Rahm come to cussing a blue streak and they interview her about it later and she says "Until that moment, I wasn't sure that he was my boy anymore...he was so very close to death. But I heard him curse, and I knew he was all there and that he was going to live." Which is fucked-up and heartwarming at the same time, isn't it? Especially since I told my own mom that after I read the article and she said "Sounds right to me."(and she's not even the family member from Chicago...that's my dad. Who only curses when he's extra-special hostile)

I suggest with alcohol. good lord.

I have many many many mundane stories that end with "....well, that could have gone terribly wrong." When the truck I was in flipped, my only thought was "Airline crash position or cover my head?" I still don't know which I went with.

Pretty sure if I go out by accident, only thing I'll be thinking will be on that level. Or "oh, well shit."

I have never had a near death experience. Semi- relatedly, Anesthesia works really oddly on me though, and although I have only had one surgical experience (wisdom teeth) I was actually aware and frozen during it. Novacaine also does not kick in for about 40 minutes after the injection, and it takes about 2 hours for advil to work. Anyway, I hope I never have "real surgery" and end up frozen and aware, because I am not sure I could take it!