Aww, babe. Glad you loved it! {}

I just pulled an Aimee.

Today is trash and recycling day. I duly put the trash out by the curb, like a good citizen should. A few minutes later, I noticed our neighbor putting her recycling bins out. "Oh!" I said to myself. "It's also recycling day!"

As I'm putting the recycling bins out on the curb, I see the truck wwwaaaaaaaaayyyyyyy down the block. Satisfied that I had accomplished my task before the truck arrived, I went inside and had a cup of coffee.

As I gaze out my front window, the truck pulls up in front of my house. The recycling man gets out of his truck and...LEAVES A FUCKING DAY-GLO ORANGE NOTE ON MY BINS AND DOES *NOT* TAKE MY FUCKING RECYCLING!

The reason, as stated on the note? "Late set out."

Oh, fuck you.

So I called the number on the note and explained the situation. "Well," the almost-but-not-quite-nice young lady on the phone says "our policy is that the bins must be out on the curb by 6 am."

"Two things wrong with that, lady," says I. "One: Nowhere on any piece of literature regarding your service have I seen any mention whatsoever of '6 am' deadline. Two: Had I set the bins out 10 minutes earlier, before your truck rounded the corner, there would be *no way* they could have known that they hadn't been out by 6 am."

"Well, still, the policy..."

"Seriously. How would they have known? Do you send pre-dawn scouting parties out?"

"A route supervisor does, sometimes, drive the route early on..."

"You're telling me there's a guy who drives by my house at 6 am every other Friday and says 'Don't pick up at 1100 Lester, their bins aren't out on time?' Really?! Really."

"Sometimes..."

"Send the truck back."

"Well, their route..."

"Send it back. Today. I'm not waiting two weeks for you idiots to come by and NOT pick up my recycling again. Send the truck back."

"I..."

"Send. Back. Truck. Today. Does a new order to the words help?"

"I'll put in a request."

"Good day to you, ma'am."

I know, I know, all those years in customer service, perhaps I could have been nicer. But all those years in customer service have taught me one thing: Shitty customer service breeds, and is punished by, shitty customers.

I got some shitty customer service today. Welcome to the results. Fucktards.

Okay, that's INSANE. Why does it matter when the fuck the bins are set out, as long as they're there when the recycling truck arrives at your curb?

Seriously. I can't even figure out how a bin is "late" if it's sitting at the curb when the truck arrives. "Late" would be putting your bin out when you notice that all the other bins on your neighbors' curbs are already empty.

(Also, I don't believe for a second that some schmoe pre-drives the route before 6 a.m.)

Also, I don't believe for a second that some schmoe pre-drives the route before 6 a.m.

If he does, well, I understand Michigan city goverments are looking for belt-tightening measures. That seems like a good candidate right there.

I'm Today's Featured Article on Wikipedia today!

Holy cats, missy! That is SOME article!

Also, I don't believe for a second that some schmoe pre-drives the route before 6 a.m.

If he does, well, I understand Michigan city goverments are looking for belt-tightening measures. That seems like a good candidate right there.

Right? If they're under such budget constraints that they can only pick up recycling every other week, I reckon they'd save money if they eliminated the pre-drive-the-route guy.

Okay, that's INSANE. Why does it matter when the fuck the bins are set out, as long as they're there when the recycling truck arrives at your curb?

Seriously. I can't even figure out how a bin is "late" if it's sitting at the curb when the truck arrives. "Late" would be putting your bin out when you notice that all the other bins on your neighbors' curbs are already empty.

WHAT I'M SAYIN'!! My sistah!

(Also, I don't believe for a second that some schmoe pre-drives the route before 6 a.m.)

I believe there's a schmoe who *says* he pre-drove the route before 6 a.m. "No, yeah, it's all good. Yeah. What? No, I wasn't sleeping, I, uh...well, I'm drunk. Yeah. Cool, talk to you later."

If he does, well, I understand Michigan city goverments are looking for belt-tightening measures. That seems like a good candidate right there.

So wise.

One of the civilized things about San Francisco is you don't have to race your trashcan to the curb at the asscrack of dawn.

We have bins for garbage, recycling and plant trimmings. You put it in whenever. The trucks come around twice a week and they've all got big jangling collections of keys that get them into the lower part of the apartment building to pull out the bins.

Its like having house elves.

One of the civilized things about San Francisco is you don't have to race your trashcan to the curb at the asscrack of dawn.

My first reaction to this was, "Yeah, you can just roll it down the hill...."

My first reaction to this was, "Yeah, you can just roll it down the hill...."

One way or another, it's probably ending up in the bay.