For the Buffista sociologists: a new post about "Gay Marriage and the Social Construction of Social “Problems”", from Sociological Images: [link]

(I swear I used to talk about other stuff, other than my daughter. If I am thread-hijacking, please tell me to take it LJ or the like.)

Conference with Emeline's teachers this morning. We are starting the ball rolling with assesments for ADHD. One of her teachers taught Special Ed for years before gtting Montessori certified and she thinks that my gut instinct about there being bigger issues afoot are right. She's been through it with her daughter, who showed a lot of the same behaviors that Emeline has been showing and Em has just been miserable at school. She doesn't want to try anything new because she can't focus on it and knows she'll get into trouble, other kids don't want to play with her because she's so boingy that she inadvertently hurts them and then she gets upset that she hurt them and she didn't mean to, she can't hold eye contact for any amount of time at all, she is distracted by anything all the time, etc etc etc.

They want, and we want, to get it figured out and get it "fixed" [insert better term here] before she starts hating school and it really becomes a BIG problem.

It's not the end of the world and it's not my fault or Joe's fault - it's brain chemistry; it's physiological - but man am I depressed about it. Joe is upset about it, too. But all in all, if it is ADHD and we decide to do medication and it helps her? Well eff being upset about it.

They do love her, though. And she is really bright and they don't think she needs to be held back, but they also said we need to figure this out because it's affecting her progress.

t slumps

Thank you guys, for the millionth time, for being so supportive and being my "invisible" sounding board. It helps so much I can't even begin to verbalize it.

(((Aims))) You are not thread hijacking. ADHD is certainly not the end of the world and it can be so much worse if you ignore it and hope it goes away.

Aims, I need to say that I love Em's teachers. It's wonderful to see that they're truly at her best and trying to help her, and you.

Do not become depressed. You've got a wonderful kid who needs a leading and better understanding of what's happening, and it's GREAT that all sides involved don't think she's stupid, problematic, that it's her fault or that she's a freak, as so many others get mistreated.

Go ahead, now. Rest, try to understand what Em's needs are, and rest some more. I'm relieved to hear that you're on a safe ground and in one line with everyone on the Em front.

And just in case, if hell will break loose, remember the baby camel-Em exchange offer.

{{{}}} to you, Joe, and your great kid and her teachers.

{{{{Miracleborns}}}}

{{{{Katerina Bee}}}}

I also feel like a huge push-over. I suck at setting boundaries with Olivia. The girl bargains and is relentless. I fold like a cheap card table.

Half the time with Dylan I give in to ridiculous requests in order to reward his communication skills. (I'm pretty sure I get to blame my dad for this, since he's the one who raised ME that way.)

We are starting the ball rolling with assesments for ADHD. One of her teachers taught Special Ed for years before gtting Montessori certified and she thinks that my gut instinct about there being bigger issues afoot are right. She's been through it with her daughter, who showed a lot of the same behaviors that Emeline has been showing and Em has just been miserable at school.

I'm sure it doesn't feel like it yet, but this is GREAT news. Having a plan and a supportive informed teacher can only mean good things going forward.

Aims, I'm not a mother so I have no support to offer on that front. But having taught a number of fantastic students with ADHD, when I was teaching high school, it sounds like you're totally going the right way about things. (The most intelligent student I've ever taught had ADHD. She was an utter joy to have in my class. As long as she was being stretched and kept interested enough!) As Jessica says, it's good that you have a plan and you're moving things forward. Wishing you all the very best outcomes with the situation.

We are so damned lucky to have amazing teachers for her. I truly don't think Em could have had a better placement. They are wonderful, wonderful women. And so very open with communication and advice and help and truly, truly teamplayers. They thank me every time I come in to talk to them, which cracks me up, because I'm trying to thank them for taking the time to talk to me. It still astounds me that some parents don't communicate with their kids teachers and see education as a team sport.

Aimee, I'm agreeing with everyone else in admiring your dedication to the most important job of all. And adding that your selfcare...in trusting your instinct, gathering information, managing your stress with this great sounding board, and employing the best resources...well, that's the best gift you can give Emeline. Even when it doesn't seem so, she's learning from that and it will serve her well.

It still astounds me that some parents don't communicate with their kids teachers and see education as a team sport.

The fact that most parents DON'T do what you just instinctively know to do is why I'm no longer a school counselor.

I say again, Good For You!

And to add to everything, there is a whole bunch of things you can do once you get a diagnosis--that will make everyone's life more pleasant.