I'm leaving the state to break up with someone via email.

Oh, honey. I've done that. Well, it was via phone, but, yeah. Big hugs.

Oh, honey. I've done that. Well, it was via phone, but, yeah. Big hugs.

I will have the power of the Vortex to keep me from stupidity. This time it will work.

Hi! I miss you. We should try and set a time to catch up over the phone, or summat.

Oh, smonster, good luck, hon. May the power of Vortex strengthen you.

Good luck, smonster. And yay, Vortex!

Happy birthday, MM!

Hippo Birdies MM!

Happy Birthday, MM!

Happy Birthday, MM!

P-C, I think you should absolutely tell your mother that, and then not answer any phone calls from her for a while.

I'm leaving the state to break up with someone via email.

Oh honey. But you will have Vortex (who totally needs the Dick-Weed polish) to keep you strong and entertain you.

ION, some people impulse-buy nail polish, I buy toy food for my new doll. But tiny cupcakes! And cake stands! And champagne flutes!

{{{smonster}}}

{{{P-C}}}

The cats put on a show for my entertainment a while ago. Harvey got under the comforter that serves as a cover for one of our sofas, and Sammie proceeded to attack him. When he finally crawled out, they wrestled hammer-and-tongs for about seven minutes.

So what does this magic necklace do again?

My grandmother consulted a psychic or priest or someone in India, and I have some bad juju related to Thursdays or something, so this magic locket is supposed to take it away. And then my perfect woman will arrive and everyone will be happy!

I've been looking at statistics for the math Employment Center, which is where I'll have my interviews next week. Last year, the average applicant had between 1 and 3 interviews. I have four scheduled. About 40% of applicants got at least one job offer from a place where they interviewed. At least two of the places where I'm interviewing are looking to hire more than one person. As far as qualifications go, I think I'm somewhat below average in research qualifications and somewhat above average in teaching qualifications, and all four places that want to interview me are jobs that put more emphasis on teaching than on research.

As far as location goes, there's one in a boring place near an exciting city, one in a cute small city that has a vegan grocery store, one in a warm climate right near the ocean, and one in the middle of some gorgeous scenery and not too far from a city I love.

I'm feeling relatively confident. Still preparing like hell, though. And this recurring dream where I sit down at an interview table and can't say anything because I get stuck in a stutter on the first word? That can stop any time now, please.

I think I've figured out my outfits. Outfit 1: black pants, black jacket, lavender fine-gauge sweater. Outfit 2: gray pants, black top with flowery detail thingy. Outfit 3: gray pants, white top, black jacket. Or possibly Outfit 3: black pants, red top with ribbon at neckline.

Only jewelry will be earrings, because I always start fiddling with a necklace if I'm wearing one. Wristwatch goes in my pocket during interviews, because I cannot stop myself from checking the time about every two minutes, even when I don't even care what time it is, and people tend to read that as me getting impatient.

Minimal makeup -- lip gloss, a little blush, a little eyeshadow. I'm going to be wearing glasses, not contacts, so any eye stuff will look magnified, and I'm crap at putting on eye makeup, anyway.

(Focusing on details helps me not be so nervous. If I make as many decisions as possible well ahead of time, then on the days of the interviews, the only things I'll have to think about are the interview questions.)