I'm guessing it starts with "M".

Oh, no doubt! :)

To be fair, I had severed my humerus just a couple of mm above my elbow, and until they x-rayed it, they thought I had just dislocated my elbow, so they were moving it around a WHOLE lot more than they did after they saw the pictures. And the radiology tech did ask me to grip his hand and bury my face in his neck. These things happen.

That was the one and only time I had morphine, and it was very weird. I could still feel the pain, I just didn't care.

When I broke my arm and they were x-raying and setting the bone, I actually yelled, "motherfucker" and bit one of the radiology techs on the shoulder.

You needed a punching intern!

OMG that's awesome.

The guy I bit was incredibly nice about it.

Of everything, this seemed no big.

Yeah, pooping during the birth of your child is really nothing to be embarrassed about. Unless you're the father.

When my friends had their baby at home, the mom was so focused in the hot tub that she dug her nails into her husband's foot (he was in the water, rubbing her back) so hard that she left permanent marks. HIS focus was so great, he never made a peep.

Amazingly, there was very little blood. There was, however, (white fonted for the squeamy): a four foot stream of fluid that fountained across the room.

The mom was on her side at this point, having just fallen/lied down on the bed with one leg kicked up. Magically, that was caught in one of my photos. I'm guessing that one will come out when if the kid ever brings a serious girlfriend home.

I'm pretty sure S is a subscriber to Aims' newsletter because she seemed to be conquering the contractions with such a force of will that she only allowed herself about a 5 minute window of fear. In fact, she was so prepared for the 'oh my god, I'm being Aliened!' pain that she told us all what to look for. Since none of us freaked out, it worked out much better for her.

really nothing to be embarrassed about. Unless you're the father.

I have totally seen worse.

Amazingly, there was very little blood. There was, however, (white fonted for the squeamy):

Tell me that was the guy's reaction to the foot thing.

Tell me that was the guy's reaction to the foot thing.

Sadly, no. It was the mom.

The cord was also wrapped twice around the baby's neck, which the parents did not know until they looked at the photos the next day.

Man. I loved that midwife. She just slipped the cord off without missing a beat. Gave me the fastest "hush you" look I have ever received and we moved on to the next step.

She also had the baby crawling up the bed when he was one and a half hour old. Absolutely miraculous.

I screamed in the pushing phase with Dillo. It wasn't "ack I am in terrible pain" screaming; it was screaming for effort. In between pushes I clearly remember saying, in a normal voice, "This is so much easier than last time." (When he was born and placed on my chest covered with - note Steph - *blueberry* yogurt, I said to him, "Hello little one! You are so gross!" The nurses bust out laughing.)

I had two non-medicated labors and vaginal births and two episiotomies, and never took as much as a Tylenol afterwards. The endorphin high is AWESOME (and was even after Casper's birth, which was a lot longer and harder work than Dillo's). I would gladly give birth again if not for the whole year-and-a-half of sleep deprivation that comes after it (i.e. Actual Baby). To me it's much more like hard physical exercise - like running a marathon - than like pain.

That was the one and only time I had morphine, and it was very weird. I could still feel the pain, I just didn't care.

Yep. I yelled in pain when they reset my wrist, but I had the weird sensation the pain and the yelling belonged to someone other than me.