My own behavior is very different if I'm focusing on a person, instead of something I'm working on, when I tend to be abrupt and possibly rather brusque. It's hard to look at one's own behavior from the outside, but I think I can switch back and forth between "people mode" and "information/task mode" in a half-second, which probably leaves many people confused. I can see how someone, especially someone whose own primary mode of engagement is people/emotion focused, might misunderstand my "task mode" as me being dismissive or insensitive to her/him personally.

I suppose I could work on that. Or I could just be relieved that my primary communication with my co-workers now is by email.

Aims - Bwahahahahahahahahaha!!!

Also, I'm afeared if that happens the mix will turn up at the next F2F.

I've decided not to get into a comments argument about pregnancy dietary guidelines as it relates to Top Chef judging. I think I deserve a pat on the back for this.

I think I deserve a pat on the back for not letting my brain liquify and drain out my ears just trying to imagine it.

All vacant slots will be filled with music by The Backstreet Boys, Jon Tesh, and Hannah Montana and assigned to your name!!

And this must be why they call you The Empress.

rubs baby bump if permission granted

Permission granted gladly, but you'll have to wait a couple months. The bump in its current state is easily mistaken for beer-belly.

I'm told to work on my bluntness at every single performance review I've ever had. It's a thing.

I'm trying to work out if there's even a song by the Backstreet Boys I could term a guilty pleasure (I can list NSYNC and Spice Girls tunes I like, but I don't think they make the cut). John Tesh is an automatic hell no. And Hannah Montana? I don't even want to know.

So Aims is indeed the devil.

My intended work persona is forceful and friendly. I will shoot the shit with just about anyone, and crack jokes, but I will also stick up for my ideas and correct people when I think they're wrong...up to the point where it becomes apparent that it's counterproductive or just plain fruitless. I hope that's how it comes over. I have to pay attention to things like apportioning attention more evenly so I don't get people's goat up by leaving them out, and making sure I give positive feedback so that people keep listening. I like to think my father's diplomacy career had a lot to teach me. I hope I picked stuff up. I know I've let people run over me in the past, plus I've been pointlessly confrontational. No more of either.

So Aims is indeed the devil.

I am indeed. t takes bow

I got fired for being cranky and blunt and not being "positive enough."

I think I need to work for Ari Gold.

I think a lot of it also depends on the industry/specific department you're in. My dev guys (and gal) talk to me way differently than the designers, and both those styles are different from the content team.

The one female developer made the girl here before me cry on a regular basis because her short, sharp way of talking was not what the other girl expected.

It bothers me not at all because that's the way I'd prefer to communicate, but that's not the style of my team or some of the other teams I have to work with.

Having said all that, I now need to have a "What is this deliverable????" discussion that I have no idea how to approach. Somewhere in the hourlong meeting what the tech team needed and what the design team said they'd produced totally disconnected. Or the disconnect happened in the design team. Either way, there are some nice people I don't want to embarass that I need to question. Yuck.

I think a lot of it also depends on the industry/specific department you're in.

Oh, my word, yes! I was in a social-work/direct-care job, which was NOT the right fit for me.

This is why I'm moving into a college teaching environment, because, while I am an excellent teacher, my personality is set up for more bluntness and directness than stroking soothing. I'm kind and caring, but I am not a stroker.