Oddly, I make a special effort to look in the eyes of the homeless or people soliciting money or people who look "odd". I figure they feel invisible a lot so even if I am saying no to them about spare change, I want them to know I see them as a peer.
I could be more like Scrappy.
I have good relationships with several of the homeless fellows in my neighborhood. No relationship at all with another.
When walking, I endeavor to smile at, and greet everyone I pass. By 'greet' I mean murmuring, 'morning/afternoon/evening.' I don't always even include the 'good.'
If it is obviously a tourist, which is fairly common on my street, they get the friendly eye contact. People I know to nod at, get eye contact and a smile. If I get a bad vibe as someone approaches, I'll shuffle by.
The thing I don't understand, though I've heard completely rational explanations here regarding personal space, both physical and psychic...is when people seem actively angry that they've been addressed by a stranger. As if that really is taking something away from them.
It certainly isn't meant as an assault when I murmur a word acknowledging someone's humanity. But I've been addressed, on occasion, as if it were. (Seriously, my greetings are the lowest of keys. Boisterous greeters bother me too.)
Civility, I know, is practically a dirty word anymore, but I feel compelled to hold the line. There is enough isolation without making the streets even meaner.
From my neighborhood watch Yahoo group last night:
At 11:40 this evening, we watched CHP cars (at least 3) slowly drive down the street. One car stopped and the officers were using the car search light and flashlights to search the front yards along lower Covington near Marlow, as another car parked in the Marlow/Covington intersection. About five minutes later we watched as an officer (on foot, trailing a CHP car going UP Covington to Revere) walked a goat on a leash up the middle of the street. I kid you not.
20 min later, and all is quiet.
Was there a Fellini convention in the 'hood?
I just saw a family walking down the street -- the son was wearing a Boy Scout uniform, and the father was wearing a hat with a giant plastic ear of corn. A few minutes later, two Model T Fords (or something similar -- old-timey cars like that) drove by.
Was there a Fellini convention in the 'hood?
Heh. Nope. Locally goats are used for pre-fire season trimming and pruning. It's awesome! My hood is surrounded by hills on all sides, and right now they're brimming with goats! I really really really want to steal one.
I sometimes feel weird about eye contact because well, crazy people think I'm fascinating.Even if it's not a full-on wacko encounter(I've had a lot fewer of those in recent years) like Seska, I have a hard time dealing with people watching me as much as they do.
Happy birthday, vw!!!!
This eye contact stuff is interesting. I always look people in the eye because I think it's rude not to. Like I'm not giving them my attention and the respect they deserve. It's fascinating that some of y'all find that intrusive. I think people are being shifty or lying to me if they don't look me in the eye.
Peoples are different, yo.
I think people are being shifty or lying to me if they don't look me in the eye.
Peoples are different, yo.
And the sleaziest person I ever met always made sure to look sincerely into people's eyes.
It's a weird world.
It's a weird world.
Amen, sistah! Truer words never spoken.
