If anything, I'd think eating vegetables would be part of the oppression of women, because we're supposed to be thin and cook healthy for our menfolk, who'd be eating solid animal fat if not for our nurturing and civilizing influence. But maybe I should wait until at least one of us has actually read the whole book before I start discussing it.

So far, she's mostly just been talking about that division -- meat as masculine food, vegetables as feminine food -- and how the division, along with meat being considered higher quality food, is linked to women having lower status in society. I haven't yet gotten to anything about meat in particular, rather than just the usual "This is for men, and that's for women, and the men's stuff is clearly better," applied to food. She cited a bunch of studies of what working-class families in England ate in the 1800s, and most of them found that the families could only afford a little bit of meat each week, and that meat went to the husband, while the wife and kids ate mostly vegetables. There are a bunch of examples of stuff like that, but I'm not yet sure where she's going with all this. I picked up the book because people keep citing it in blog arguments, and I figured it sounded like it could be interesting.

The cover is decorated with lots of pictures from ads and menus and stuff like that of things like a naked women, crouching and smiling coyly at the viewer, wearing a cowboy hat, with her body divided up by dotted lines and the different cuts of meat labeled.

I just remembered that I was going to get a box of Chanukah candles while I was in NJ, and I forgot. There are a bunch of stores in DC that I think might sell them, but all of them are just a little further than I want to walk to maybe not buy anything. I'm nearly positive that the grocery store at the Watergate sells them, but walking there with an unstable ankle through the slush and ice that I'm sure are going to be coating the sidewalks for the next day or two doesn't seem like the greatest idea. (The Watergate is at the bottom of a hill, and getting there from here involves crossing several streets where there's a crosswalk but no traffic light and the street is angled so that you can't really see the cars coming.)

There are a bunch of stores in DC that I think might sell them, but all of them are just a little further than I want to walk to maybe not buy anything.

Why don't you call ahead?

Why don't you call ahead?

Oh. Huh. That would be a good idea, wouldn't it?

My old Safeway carried the most gorgeous Chanukah candles. Gradations of blue and also red to yellow. I need to stock up on them again. They are just so pretty, I often put them in vases.

Right. I thought I still had a box of candles in the freezer but I do not, I have one candle. Better fix that soon.

Yeah. Y'all aren't going to believe this.  

I ended up going over there last night because I was worried. We had a long and emotional talk. I think that my taking such a strong stand was what KBD needed to crack the walls around his heart. He is very much transformed and even so soon my emotions toward him have shifted enormously. 

I know it sounds nuts and not a good idea, but we are going to craft a written plan to move forward.  

I'm happier today than I've been in ages and feel better about the relationship than any time since the beginning. I'm not dumb, I know there's a hard road ahead, but I feel good about it.   

Thank all again for your love and support. 

Good luck, smonster. I hope the change lasts.

Too fucking right, -t. Now that I finally put my foot down, I will not be taking any shit, thankyouverymuch.

Stephen Fry is on Graham Norton. Awesomecakes. Next week, 50 Cent? I can't quite wrap my head around that one.

I wondered what the "giddy" update on Facebook meant and now I know! Good luck you two!